Predator
by JayAndAbiFanfic
Summary: Abi Branning is finally beginining to move on with her life after her dramatic split from Ben Mitchell but news from her past threatens to turn her world in turmoil. Can Jay save her in time? An Eastenders fanfic.
1. Chapter 1

"I'm looking for Abigail Branning? Is she here?"  
"No," Louise snared, beginning to shut the front door of the Mitchell's home.  
The woman put her hand out to stop her. "The address I have for her is here."  
"Yeah, well she doesn't live here anymore."  
"Then do you have an address for her?"  
"She's not our problem anymore."  
"Louise?" a male voice came down the stairs. "Who is it?"  
"I don't know," she shrugged. "Some middle aged woman looking for your psycho ex-girlfriend."  
"Do you know where she is?" the speaker asked, taking a step past Louise.  
"Excuse me, you can't just come in here-"  
"Shut up, Louise," Ben interrupted. "Who's looking for her?"  
"I'm her social worker."  
"Social worker?" Ben repeated. "Why does she need a social worker for?"  
"I'm afraid I can't tell you that, its confidential. But if you could give me an address for her I'd be grateful."  
"Of course," Ben replied, scribbling Dot's address down on the back of a used envelope. "Here you go."  
"Thank you." The social worker turned to leave.  
"She's okay, isn't she? Abi, I mean. She's not in any trouble."  
She shook her head. "Of course she isn't. Everything is fine, I just need to have a quick word with her. Thanks for your help."  
Ben nodded and closed the door behind her.  
"Why are you helping her for?" Louise questioned.  
"What?"  
"Abi, why are you helping her?"  
"I'm not helping her."  
"But you gave-"  
"It was an address, Louise. What difference does it make?"  
"After what she done to you, I wouldn't have anything to do with her."  
"Well you don't have to, do you? And stop trying to make out she's a bad person."  
"She is! She-"  
"I know what she done, Louise, but you don't know her."  
"I don't have to."  
"Abi is a good person, and she doesn't need aggro of you so just leave it alone, yeah?"

Abi's social worker had been waiting at the door for almost 5 minutes now and she was about to give up when an elder lady with red hair answered.  
"Sorry, dear, I was just up in the bathroom. I didn't even hear the door go."  
"That's alright," she smiled. "I was wondering if you could help me."  
"Of course. What can I do for you?"  
"I'm looking for Abigail Branning. I was told she lived here."  
"She does but she's at work right now."  
"Do you have any idea what time she'll be home?"  
"Not until later. Six or seven o'clock she said."  
Abi's social worker looked at her watch. It was only now coming up to ten. It would be ages until Abi got home and she had to travel back up to Manchester for work tomorrow.  
"Here," she said, taking something out of her bag. "This is my card. Could you pass it on to her? My name is on there, she'll know who I am."  
Dot nodded and smiled. "Of course I will. I'll get her to ring as soon as she gets in."  
"Great, thank you!"

"Alright bruv?" Ben asked walking into Billy's house.  
Jay nodded but he looked far from alright. He'd been having a shitty time since the news about Linzi had come out and everywhere he went he had people shutting at him, calling him a pervert and paedophile. Anyone who knew Jay knew he was nothing of the sort but others didn't take too kindly to things like that.  
"I bought you a bacon butty," Ben said, handing it over. "Any luck on the job front?"  
Jay shook his head. "Nobody wants to employ somebody who's on the sex offenders list."  
"I'm sorry about dad. I've tried to talk to him but-"  
"Don't bother. I don't want to work for somebody who thinks I'm capable of that. You know I'd never go near Louise. I was in a relationship anyway. I'd never even think about trying it on with another girl."  
"And I also know what Louise is like. She's a massive flirt. It doesn't surprise me that she'd try to kiss you. Anyway, you don't have to worry about that. She's got her eye on some new boy. Kush's brother apparently."  
Jay nodded but Ben could tell her wasn't really listening.  
"Something will come up. Why don't I try talking to Pam? I'm her favourite person right now."  
"Well I'm glad you are."  
"I thought she was more than happy to have you work for her."  
"So did I."  
"Then what happened?"  
Jay shrugged. "Budget cuts or something."  
"Well there must be somebody else round here you could ask."  
"Like who? Everybody's about to lose their jobs anyway now that Ian's decided to sell up."  
"What about Jack?"  
"What about him?"  
"I'm sure they've got some work need doing on the construction site."  
"I'm not qualified, am I?"  
"But I'm sure he'll make an acceptation. Now he's with Ronnie you're basically family."  
Jay pulled a face. "Family? The Mitchell's don't care about me."  
"Well, you could ask Abi. She could have a word with him."  
"I haven't even spoken to her for weeks. It won't look great if I suddenly start to ask her a favour."  
"It's Abi. She won't mind."  
Jay shrugged. "Maybe."  
"Speaking of Abi, some woman was round earlier looking for her."  
"Yeah? Who?"  
"She said she was a social worker. Do you know anything about that?2  
"Social worker? Why would Abi need a social worker?"  
"That's what I thought."  
"You don't think she's in some sort of trouble with you."  
Ben shrugged. "Who knows? You can never tell with Abi."

Abi sighed as she slunk down on the sofa at Dot's. She'd just done a ten hour shift and tired was certainly an understatement. She was happy she'd been able to get a job at the bets but she didn't want to be a receptionist. Sitting around at a desk answering telephone calls all day was certainly not what she wanted to spend the rest of her life doing.  
"Abi?" Dot called. "Is that you?"  
"Yeah. I'm in here."  
She waited until Dot came into the living room before she spoke again.  
"Sorry I'm back so late. We were short staffed today and it was a nightmare. Who knew so many hamsters could get pregnant?"  
Dot chuckled and sat down next to her.  
"Somebody came round for you today."  
Abi frowned. "Who?"  
"I didn't catch her name. She said you'd know who she was."  
She handed Abi the card which had her name and number on it. _Stella Smith,_ it read.  
Abi recognised the name straight away and her blood ran cold. It had been a long time since she had spoken to Stella and the thought of it made her feel sick. Something bad must have happened for Stella to get into contact with her.  
"Did she say what she wanted?" Abi asked. Her voice shook slightly as she spoke but Dot didn't seem to notice.  
"No, she didn't. She just asked if you could ring her. Is something the matter?"  
"No," Abi forced a smile. "No, everything is fine."  
Dot smiled.  
"I better give her a call," Abi said pulling her mobile out of her back pocket and standing up. "I'll be back in a minute."  
She took the stairs two at a time, dialing the number as she went and pressed call as she reached her room. Abi paced the room as the phone rang and then decided to sit on the edge of the bed to stop herself being jittery.  
"Hello?"  
"Stella, hi. It's Abi Branning. What's going on?"

 _ **Hi everybody! Welcome back to a new fanfic. I'm really excited about this story as it's a little bit different from my other average Abi and Jay love story and I hope you'll like it too. Let me know what you think by review, following and favouriting :)**_


	2. Chapter 2

Abi sat up with a start, her breathing fast and heavy. She'd just woken up from a dream, or more like a nightmare, and didn't want to go back to that place again. She _never_ wanted to go back to that place again. She looked at the clock sitting on her bedside table and noticed the time was only now five, too early to get up for work, but she opened her wardrobe and pulled out her running gear instead, which consisted of some black and pink workout leggings and a black vest top. She pulled a black hoodie on over her head as she went downstairs, making sure to be quiet as not to wake up Dot, and grabbed a bottle of water on her way out of the door.  
Abi didn't go out for runs very often, preferring to attend the classes at her gym instead where she could have a quick catch up with her old school friends before it started, but this morning she needed to get out and clear her head.  
Stella hadn't given her much to go on the night before. She said she didn't want to talk about it over the phone and instead arranged to meet her when Abi's shift ended at six that evening but that didn't stop Abi's mind from wandering. In fact it had only made her worry even more. The thought of seeing Stella scared her and the thought of the things she could tell her scared her even more.

Jay put his hands on his knees, trying to catch his breath again when he saw a certain blonde jog past across the square. Since everything had happened with Linzi, Jay woke up early most mornings and went for a run to prepare himself for the awful day he knew he had ahead of him, but today was the first time he had seen Abi. He knew she used to get up early for a run when she lived at the Mitchells and before when they were together but it was never very often. It was usually because she was stressed out about school or worried about Ben breaking up with her and it got him thinking about what Ben had told him yesterday, the social worker coming round. He wanted to go over and ask if she was okay but when he looked up to find her again, she was already gone.

Abi checked her phone again for the 100th time that day and although it felt like it had been hours since she'd last looked at the time, her phone told her it had only been two minutes. She was beyond nervous to meet Stella and she still had to get to work first for a shift that didn't start for another hour.  
She jumped a few minutes later when somebody sat down in the seat opposite her, placing a mug of coffee in front of her.  
"I saw you were finished."  
Abi looked up and saw Jay in front of her.  
"Oh, it's you."  
"Gee, thanks. You know how to make a guy feel welcome."  
"Sorry, I didn't meant that. I just-"  
"It's alright, Abi," Jay laughed. "I was only joking."  
"Oh." Abi tried to smile and failed.  
"Everything okay?"  
"Yeah. Why wouldn't it be?" Abi answered defensively.  
Jay shrugged. "No reason. Listen, I was wondering if you could do me a favour?"  
"Yeah, of course."  
"You don't know what it is yet," Jay laughed.  
"You know I'd do anything to help you. I know the stuff Linzi has been saying is a load of rubbish."  
"You do?"  
"Of course. I know you better than you know yourself, Jay. Anyway, what was the favour you were after?"  
"I know it's a big ask, but I was wondering if you could have a word with Jack."  
"Jack?" Abi repeated. "What for?"  
"I am in desperate need of a job. Funnily enough, not many people want to hire a pervert."  
"Jay, you're not a pervert. Don't say things like that."  
"It's what they're all thinking."  
Abi shook her head but continued anyway. "I thought Pam had given you a job."  
"She gave me the sack, didn't she?"  
"What? Why?"  
"I don't know, said they couldn't afford to take me on or some rubbish like that."  
"Well I can have a word with Jack if you want, but I can't make any promises."  
Jay lent forward and kissed her on the cheek. "You are a star, Abigail Branning."  
Abi was surprised at the fuzzy feeling in her stomach when Jay lent towards her. She hadn't felt anything like that for him for months but she quickly brushed it aside, putting it down to somebody actually paying attention to her for the first time in what must be months.  
"I try my best," she smiled. "Although I'm not sure everybody would agree with you."  
"Hey," Jay spoke soothingly. "What happened with Ben, that wasn't you fault."  
"No, I'm pretty sure it was. I didn't see Ben faking a pregnancy. Anyway," Abi breathed. "I don't want to talk about him."  
Jay nodded understandingly. "Actually, there was something else I wanted to talk to you about."  
"Yeah?"  
Jay nodded. "Ben said somebody was looking for you yesterday, some social worker?"  
"What? Why was he talking to her?"  
"He didn't know who she was or what she was after, but I just wanted to make sure everything was okay."  
Abi nodded far too enthusiastically. "Everything is fine. Of course it is."  
"You sure?"  
Abi checked the time on her phone once again and made an excuse to leave. "I'm sorry, my shift starts soon. I didn't realise it was so late."  
"Right, of course. I'll see you around then."  
Abi nodded before quickly standing up, grabbing her coat and walking out of the cafe.

Abi had been wishing her shift to hurry up all afternoon but now it had finally finished she didn't want to go. She knew what was coming but she couldn't stand to hear it be said out loud.  
"Everything alright, Abi?" her colleague, Matilda, asked. "Usually you shoot out of here when you're shift has finished."  
"Yeah, I've just got a lot on my mind at the moment."  
"Anything I can help you with?"  
Abi shook her head, trying to maintain a smile. "No, nothing I can't handle."  
"Okay, well I'll see you tomorrow then?"  
"Yeah, see you then."  
Abi made her way outside and got into her car before heading in the direction of the cafe where her and Stella had arranged to meet. She hadn't wanted to meet her anyway nearby in fear that somebody would see them and start talking. She didn't want any more gossip going around the square, not after everything that had just happened with Ben.  
Fifteen minutes later, Abi arrived. Stella was already sitting at a table with two mugs in front of her presumably filled with coffee. It had been over ten years since they'd last seen each other but Stella hadn't changed one bit. Abi, on the other hand, was far from the innocent, ginger kid she had once been all those years ago.  
"Stella," Abi smiled. "Hi."  
"Wow, Abi." Stella stood up to give her a hug. "You look so different. I almost didn't recognise you. What happened to the ginger?"  
Abi laughed nervously and sat down opposite Stella. "Being compared to my dad all the time didn't quite cut it."  
"What have you been up to all these years? Did you become a vet?"  
"Almost, I'm a vet's receptionist."  
"Close enough, right?"  
"I guess. What is it that you wanted to talk to me about?" Abi asked. She didn't want to hang around all night making small talk. The waiting only made her more and more nervous.  
"It's nothing to worry about, I promise, but there's been some new developments."  
"Developments?" Abi repeated. "What kind of developments?"  
"John has been let out."  
"What?" Abi lent back in her chair, a shocked expression on her face even though she had been half expecting to hear this news. "He can't have been. He still has another-"  
"Five years, I know. But he's been released early."  
"Why? For what?"  
"Good behaviour, the usual kind of thing."  
Abi closed her eyes, trying to come to terms with what Stella had just told her.  
"I know its a shock, Abi, but you have nothing to worry about."  
"He...he can't come near me, can he?"  
"Well, technically yes," Stella told her, looking slightly guilty as she said it.  
Abi shot up from her chair. "Sorry?"  
"Because you're over eighteen now, Abi, we can't put a restraining order on him, especially because of his behaviour."  
"It's because of his behaviour that I'm in this mess." She put her head in her hands. She couldn't believe any of this was happening.  
"I know this must be hard for you, Abi, but-"  
"Hard? This is hell. I thought I'd never have to go through this again but now, now I don't know what to think." Abi hadn't even noticed her hands were shaking until she picked up the mug in front of her.  
"Abi, you have nothing to worry about. He won't come near you. He wouldn't risk it." Stella sighed realising how trivial it all sounded. "But if anything does happen then all you have to do is call me or call the police."  
Abi nodded.  
"I promise you, Abi. You don't need to be scared anymore."  
"Yeah? Well that's what I thought when they put him behind bars."


	3. Chapter 3

Abi stared at her computer screen as she waited for Lauren to answer her Skype call on the other end. It had been a few weeks now since she had last spoke to her sister and after the news she had recently received she needed to talk about it. Sure her mum and dad knew the facts, but Lauren had always been the one person that truly knew how Abi felt about the whole situation.  
"Good morning," Lauren smiled as her face popped up on screen. She'd looked happier than Abi had ever seen her since she'd been in New Zealand with Peter and Louie. She always had a glowing tan and healthy hair and the family they'd both always dreamed of. Abi couldn't help but be envious of her older sister.  
"Morning? It's nearly time for me to go to bed over here," Abi laughed. "How are you?"  
"Me? I'm fabulous," Lauren told her. "Louie had his first day at nursery on Monday, Peter and Steven are both at work so it's just me here this morning."  
"Don't you get lonely?" Abi asked, as she certainly knew she had been lonely since her and Ben had split up and her big sister wasn't around to keep her company, and most of the time, piss her off in that way that sisters do.  
Lauren shook her head. "I have too much to do to be lonely. Besides, it's nice to get some peace and quiet once in a while. How are things with you? Ben hasn't been bothering you, has he?"  
"No, I haven't really spoken to him since..." Abi trailed off, not wanting to admit what she had done out loud. She was ashamed of herself for letting Babe rope her into doing that. Especially considering it was something that her dad had been put through.  
"This is for the best, Abs," Lauren reassured her. "You and Ben were never right for each other."  
"Yeah, I think the fact that he's gay has something to do with that."  
Lauren began to laugh and then quickly stopped herself. "What is it, Abi? Something is bothering you, I can tell."  
Abi sighed. She had to tell her sooner or later. "Stella came to see me earlier."  
"Stella? Stella as in your social worker from Manchester Stella?"  
Abi nodded.  
"Why? What did she want? Has something happened?"  
"He's been released." Abi put it straight. What other way was there to put it?  
"What? He can't have been. He still has-"  
"Five years," Abi interrupted. "I know. Something to do with good behaviour."  
"Good behaviour? The guy's a massive-"  
"Please don't say it," Abi winced.  
"Sorry. I'm sorry." Lauren looked at Abi and she knew in that instant exactly how her little sister felt. "He can't come near you though, right? There must be conditions."  
"No conditions. He's redeemed himself and I'm over eighteen. That's what the courts reckon anyway."  
"That's it. I'm coming home."  
"What? No! Lauren, you can't."  
"Of course I can. I'll book a plane later and I'll be down in a couple of days."  
"Lauren, I can't ask you to do that."  
"And I can't let you stay at home alone when there's a predator on the lose."  
"I can handle myself, Lauren. Besides, Jack will be here. I don't think he's going to mess about when he knows Jack will be near by."  
"Have you told him yet? Jack, I mean."  
"No, and I'm not going to."  
"Why not? Abi, he was on the case. He can do something, can't he?"  
"He doesn't work for the force anymore, Lauren. There's nothing he can do. There's nothing anybody can do."  
"He can protect you."  
"I don't need protecting."  
"You might think you're brave now, Abs but the minute he comes near you you'll freeze up. All of those feelings will come back again, I know they will.."  
"He's not going to come near me. He wouldn't risk it."  
"He risked it before, didn't he?"  
Abi looked down at her hands in her lap nervously. She hated it when Lauren was right.  
"Give me one good reason why we shouldn't tell Jack," Lauren demanded.  
"Because he'll tell Ronnie. And then before we know it the whole Mitchell clan will know and there's enough of them around here to make up a choir. I don't need everybody knowing my business."  
"He wouldn't tell Ronnie."  
"You don't know that."  
"And neither do you."  
"I don't want people tip-toeing around me like they did in Manchester. I don't want to live that life again, Lauren. I can't."  
"Then you have to let me come home. I can look after you."  
"I can't let you ruin your life."  
"It won't be ruined. I'll get to be with my family. I miss all of you, you know?"  
"You have a new family now. Besides, you just said you weren't lonely."  
"You're my baby sister, Abs. I'll never stop caring about you."  
"Which is why I can't let you come home. I can't let you give up everything you've made in New Zealand."  
"It's my choice, Abi."  
"Please, Lauren. Just leave it for a few months, and if anything happens, if I feel like somebody's watching me or if he ever comes near me, then I'll let you come home. I promise."  
"Fine," Lauren sighed. "But you have to let people help you, Abs."  
"I will, as soon as I need the help."

The commencing weekend was Jack and Ronnie's engagement party. He'd proposed to her a week before and all of the Brannings and Mitchells had gathered round at The Albert to celebrate. To be honest, Abi was feeling slightly nervous for the occasion. It was the first time she'd had to interact with the Mitchell's like this since her break-up with Ben and Abi was sure they'd be a few snide remarks, particularly from Louise.  
"Abi," Jack greeted her when she arrived, pulling her into a hug. "You look beautiful. I'm glad you could make it."  
Abi looked down at her khaki swing dress and black wedges not feeling very beautiful at all. She'd been a mess ever since she'd seen Stella.  
"Congratulations," she said, passing him a card. "It's from me and Lauren. She wishes she could be here."  
"Ah, well, she's living it up in New Zealand now, isn't she?"  
"That's exactly what I said. No need for her to come back, right?"  
Abi stepped aside as another guest arrived and looked around the bar which was currently full of Mitchell's. She quickly scanned the room hoping to find somebody she could talk to when somebody tapped her on the shoulder.  
"I was hoping you might be here."  
Abi spun around. "Jay, hi. I didn't think you'd be here after-"  
"Yeah, well luckily it's only Phil that still hates me right now. Let's just they'll be no kick offs, eh."  
"It's a Branning-Mitchell gathering," Abi reminded him. "They'll be kick offs. There is always kick offs."  
Jay laughed and nodded in agreement.  
" _What_ is she doing here?" Abi heard a voice behind her.  
"See," Abi said to Jay. "It's started already. Hi, Louise!" She said in a over the top cheery voice.  
"Alright?" Ben mumbled.  
"Yeah," Abi nodded. "You?"  
He nodded a reply and then went to the corner where Paul was waiting for him.  
Louise stared her out. "I didn't know you were coming."  
"Of course she'd be here," Jay defended her. "Jack is her family."  
"Why are you fraternising with the enemy for anyway, Jay?" Louise huffed and followed Ben.  
"You're the enemy now?" Jay smiled. "And I thought it was me everybody hated around here."  
"I guess we're in it together."  
"If I could get everybody's attention please," Jack shouted from the end of the bar. "I'd like to make an announcement. Me and Ronnie would just like to thank every one of you for coming today. It means a lot to both of us that everybody could put aside their differences for today and our two families could come together despite any disagreements we may have between us."  
Abi snuck a glance at Louise who was still giving her a death stare.  
"I'm not going to take up much of your time, I'll save that for the wedding, but I would like to say a few words before the party gets going. As you all know, me and Ronnie haven't exactly had the easiest of times over the past few years but being away from her for so long made me realise how much I couldn't be without Ronnie, even if she drives me up the wall most of the time. So I would like you all to raise your glasses and toast, To Ronnie."  
Abi watched Ronnie as she looked away embarrassed while everybody toasted her.  
"Now let's get this party started, shall we?"  
There were a few cheers from the guests and then Abi and Jay stepped aside as the dance floor began to fill up.  
"Can I get you a drink?" Jay asked her.  
"Sure. Vodka and coke please."  
Jay smiled at her sheepishly.  
"What?" she asked.  
"Nothing. I was just thinking, tonight's going to be entertaining. We all knew how great you are at handling your drink."  
Jay winked and Abi punched him in the arm playfully.  
"Sorry to interrupt," Jack spoke. "Abi, can I have a quick word?"  
"Of course."  
Abi followed Jack outside to where a few people were standing around smoking, drinking and talking.  
"I just got a phone call from your sister."  
"Yeah?"  
"Yeah. She congratulated me, and then told me about John."  
Abi turned her head away, annoyed that Lauren had shared that information with Jack even after she'd told her, pleaded with her, not to.  
"She shouldn't have told you that."  
"Why didn't I hear it from you, Abs?" Jack sounded stern and annoyed but she knew that he wasn't really.  
"Because I don't want everybody knowing my business. What happened was a long time ago, almost eleven years, and I want it to stay in Manchester."  
"That doesn't mean that we shouldn't protect you."  
"Yeah, like you all done such a great job of that before." Jack looked hurt and Abi quickly apologised. "I didn't mean that. I just wish Lauren hadn't have told you."  
"I'm glad she did, and you should be too. You know you can come and talk to me anytime you need to, don't you?"  
Abi nodded.  
"Good, well I best be getting back inside. Are you coming?"  
"In a minute."  
Abi took a deep breath and watched Jack return to his fiancée.  
She hadn't really been in the party mood when she'd arrived and seeing Jay had perked her up a little bit but now all she wanted to do was go home and snuggle up on the sofa with a cheesy romcom and a bowl of popcorn. She took one more look around and then headed home, giving up on the night.  
From inside The Albert, Jay watched Jack come back inside and then looked behind him for Abi. When he didn't spot her, he looked outside and saw her walking away from him. The image was too familiar and he turned away, walking over to his family instead.

The next morning Abi was finally able to lay in for the first time since she had spoken to Stella. She hadn't slept so well in a long time and she thought that maybe it had been a good thing to tell Jack the truth. It felt like a weight had been lifted off her shoulders now she no longer had to deal with the stress of it all on her own.  
Once she was dressed in jeans and a casual top, Abi went downstairs to make some breakfast. Dot had left her a note on the table telling her she'd popped over to the laundrette to cover somebody's shift. Abi made herself a bowl of cereal and went to take it into the lounge to eat in front of the TV when she noticed a piece of paper sitting by the front door that had come through the letter box. Abi placed her bowl down on the table in the hall and picked the paper up, expecting it to be an advert for window cleaning or something like that.  
 _'I'm coming to get you',_ was all it said and Abi covered her mouth with a hand as her heart began to beat a little bit faster. There was only one person who would have sent that to her and the thought of it scared her more than she'd care to admit.  
A second later there was a knock on the door, making Abi jump so much that she knocked the bowl of cereal on the floor.  
"Shit!"  
She stared at the door in front of her, not entirely sure whether to answer it or not and then looked down at the mess beside her feet. She had to get it cleared up before Dot got home.  
There was a knock on the door again.  
"Abi, it's me. Are you home?"  
Abi sighed with relief as she recognised the voice as Jay's and pulled the door open.  
"Sorry, you made me jump," she explained, gesturing to the floor. "I was just getting some breakfast."  
"Do you need a hand?" he asked.  
"No," she told him, going to the kitchen to grab a cloth. "I can manage."  
"I just wanted to make sure that you were okay. You disappeared on me last night."  
Abi remembered the events of last night and then realised she'd completely ditched Jay. She'd completely forgotten about that drink he was buying her. "I know. I'm really sorry about that," she told him as she knelt on the floor to clear up the mess. "I just...I had some bad news and I wasn't really in the mood for partying. I should have come and said goodbye to you first."  
Jay shook his head. "Don't worry about it. I was just worried, that's all. Is there anything I can do?"  
"No, everything will be alright."  
"You sure? It's just you look like you've seen a ghost."  
"Like I said, you made me jump."  
"This doesn't have anything to do with that woman that was looking for you, does it? This bad news?"  
Abi pretended she was too engrossed in her cleaning to answer him.  
"Sorry, I'm being nosey. You don't need to tell me. Tell me to shut up whenever you want."  
"Um, it was just about something that happened years ago, back when we lived in Manchester. It's nothing to worry about."  
"Good. Well, in that case then you can make it up to me."  
"I can?" Abi smiled down at the floor.  
"Yeah. You owe me a drink. How about we go over the Vic tonight?"  
"Sure."  
"Really?" Jay asked surprised.  
"Yes," Abi laughed. "You thought I wouldn't?"  
"Well yeah," he admitted.  
"Come on, Jay. It's not like either of us have got many friends at the moment. I'd love to come."  
"Great. Then I'll meet you up there. Is seven okay?"  
Abi tried not to be too offended that he wanted to meet her there rather than knock for her first. He always used to be a man of chivalry when they had dated before. "Seven's perfect."  
"See you later then."

A couple of hours later, Abi was walking through the market on her way home after picking up a few ingredients for tea which he had promised to cook for Dot when somebody grabbed her arm and pulled her into the alleyway beside the Vic.  
It was too dark for her too see anything properly but that certainly didn't stop her from freaking out when the silence continued for far too long. Abi's breathing came quick and heavy and she could feel her hands begin to shake at the fear of the unknown, or more like the fear of the truth.  
"Hello, Abi."


	4. Chapter 4

"Get your hands off me." She tried to sound confident but her voice was nothing more than a whisper and she couldn't hide the tremble in it.  
"C'mon, Abi. Don't be like that. It's only me."  
Abi tried to wrench her arm free but he was holding on much tighter than he should be and he's grip only strengthened when he felt her squirm.  
"You're hurting me, John." It was the first time she'd said his name out loud since it had all happened and she didn't like the sound of it. "Please."  
He loosened his grip slightly, but not enough to let her go free.  
"Wow! Look how grown up you are. What are you now? Seventeen, eighteen?"  
"I'm twenty," she told him, her eyes on the floor the whole time  
"Time flies, eh?" He put his hand to her hair and she flinched away from his touch.  
"I need to go. I'm going to be late-"  
"Late? Late for what?" he interrupted.  
"I'm cooking dinner for my grandma. I only popped out for some ingredients. She'll be wondering where I am."  
"Why are you so nervous, Abi? It's okay. I forgive you."  
"You forgive _me_?" Abi repeated, the shock clear in her voice.  
"Of course. What we had was special, I'm not going to throw that away. I know what your parents are like, I don't blame you."  
In the time that John had been talking, Abi had managed to unclasp her hand from his grip and was taking small steps backwards away from him and towards the crowded area of the market where she knew he wouldn't be able to touch her, at least not without everybody around seeing.  
"I've got it all planned, Abi. Obviously we can't be together here, but we can go abroad. You just wait a few weeks and I'll save some money up. We can be together."  
Abi frowned.  
"What? What is it?"  
"You think I _want_ to be with you?"  
"Well, yeah. That's what we used to talk about, remember? As soon as you were old enough we were going to leave, get out of here for good."  
Abi took a final step back and she was back on the path again. She quickly turned and made her way into the middle of the street.  
"Abi, wait." John grabbed her wrist again. "I don't understand. What's the problem?"  
Abi looked around the street urgently, begging somebody to see how desperate she was, hoping they'd get him away from her. She should have known better than to upset him. She knew how quickly he could turn on her.  
"I don't want to run away with you," she whispered.  
"Of course you do. Before-"  
"That was ten years ago. I was just a kid."  
"Nothings changed. My feelings haven't changed."  
"Please, John. Just let me go."  
"Abi?" a voice came behind her. "There you are. I've been looking for you everywhere. Who's this?"  
John let go of Abi as Jay came closer, trying to act casual but he couldn't hide the hurt on his face at the news she wasn't the little girl he'd left behind. She knew what he was now. She understood and she was petrified to be alone with him for longer than a second.  
"I'm just an old friend," he told Jay. "I should be going. I'll speak to you soon." He said it like a promise and Abi knew he wasn't going to give up that easily.  
Abi nodded silently and watched him walk away with fear in my eyes.  
"Abi?" Jay spoke softly, interrupting her thoughts. "That guy, who is he? Was he bothering you?" he waited for her reply but was met with silence. "Abi talk to me."  
Abi chewed on her bottom lip, trying to hold back her tears.  
"Abs..."  
"Not here," she told him, finally coming back to life again. "Come with me."  
Abi led Jay back to Dot's and once there took him up to her bedroom.  
"Does this have something to do with that woman? The social worker?"  
Abi rummaged through her draws aimlessly, trying to find what she was looking for. She'd kept it safe from the day that they'd left Manchester, always being careful to make sure than nobody else ever came across it.  
"Abi! You're acting weird. What is going on?"  
"Here," she said passing him an old shoe box. "Open it."  
"I don't understand."  
"Just look. It'll explain everything." She looked down at her hands nervously. "But you have to promise me you'll keep this quiet. I'm only telling you this because I trust you. Nobody else can know, Jay."  
"Okay," Jay nodded, confused.  
"Promise me."  
"Okay okay, I promise."  
It was clear to Abi that he was not yet aware of the seriousness of the situation and she was certain he'd be in for a shock when he found out the truth.  
Jay sat on the edge of the bed and opened up the shoebox, pulling out the newspaper clipping that was on top.  
 _'Primary school teacher sentenced to 15 years for the sexual abuse of student, aged 9'  
_ "Go on," Abi urged him, leaning against the door. "Read it."  
She watched as Jay's eyes quickly scanned the newspaper. She was terrified at what he would think once he knew the truth but she was even more scared of what had just happened to her outside. She needed somebody to know, to help her.  
"What does this have to do with you? I...I don't understand," he stuttered.  
"The unnamed 9 year old," Abi explained. "She's...she's me Jay."  
Jay ran a hand through his hair. "No, no. it can't be." Jay spoke quickly, tripping over his words. "I'd know something like that, wouldn't I? We were together for three years. You would have told me."  
"No, I wouldn't have. I didn't want you to know. I didn't want anybody to know."  
"I want you to tell me everything. I need to understand."  
Abi sat down next to Jay on the bed to explain but she was nervous. It was the first time she had ever said any of this out loud since those long days in the court room but the images of it all were still so vivid in her mind.  
Her hands shook in her lap and Jay put his hand on top to reassure her, calm her down.  
"When I was in year 4, back when we lived in Manchester," Abi began. "John, Mr Smith, he was my teacher. About three months in to the year, he told my parents I needed some extra tuition. Believe it not, I kind of sucked at maths when I was eight, and of course my parents agreed to him tutoring me after school if they thought it would help. I was still the same back then, still desperate to become a vet and they wanted what was best for me and Lauren. They'd always wanted what was best for us even if their relationship was a mess." Abi paused for a second before continuing. "The first few weeks of tuition were fine. He taught me fractions and percentages or whatever it was and then after about a month, he suggested to my parents that he take me back to his to tutor me. He said there were too many distractions at school what with the cleaners and other teachers always milling around and he had all of the resources at his anyway. He was young at the time too, only in his late twenties, so there was no wife or girlfriend there. It was just him. Just me and him. Anyway, everything was fine for a while and then one week he just...he touched me in a place that he shouldn't have done."  
"Oh, Abi. I'm so sorry."  
Abi shook her head. "Please don't. Don't apologise. I know you feel sorry but it was okay. I mean, I didn't have any idea what was going on. I didn't understand that what he was doing was wrong. I wasn't scared or frightened. I was fine. Things continued like that for a while and then he took it to the next level, that's how he described anyway, we had sex. That way he was absolutely sure that I really cared."  
"You mean...he, he raped you?"  
"It wasn't like that. Not really."  
" How else do you explain it?"  
"It wasn't like he forced me to do it. He asked first. It sounds silly but through it all he always asked. He always made sure I was okay."  
"He groomed you, Abi."  
"Yeah. I guess he did. But it was like, it was almost as if I was in love with him. I mean, I know I was only nine so it wasn't the same way I felt about you or about Ben, but it was like I became obsessed. If I saw him talk or touch one of the other girls in my class I used to get so mad. He felt the same way about me too, I know he did. We always used to talk about running away together. As soon as I turned sixteen we were going to move to America or Australia. Somewhere hot and exciting. Somewhere he could give me everything I wanted.`"  
"So what happened? How did he end up in prison?"  
"When I started year five we got a new teacher but he insisted we carry on with the tuition. He said my grades were still below average, which wasn't surprising considering we never actually did any maths, so my parents let me carry on going to his every week. About three months into the school year, our sex education lessons started and one week the topic of abuse came up and that was when I realised what he was doing. I realised that everything he had been doing was wrong." Abi squeezed her eyes shut trying to block out the painful images. " I told my mum that night and from then on it was police interviews and court hearings. They couldn't post my name in the papers because of my age, that's why you didn't understand at first, but that didn't stop the whole school from hearing about it." Abi stopped talk to take a breath and quickly wiped away a stray tear that she hadn't even realised was there. "People think we moved here because my dad was having an affair but that had nothing to do with it. My dad had been having affairs from the day him and mum first got together and that had never been a good enough reason for her to leave him before. We moved to London because I couldn't cope with the gossip anymore, people talking behind my back and tiptoeing around me all the time. Mum and dad were on the brink of divorce when we moved but they wouldn't dare break up after what happened. They didn't know what it would do to me."  
"I'm sorry you felt like you had to hide that away, keep it to yourself for so many years."  
"I wasn't entirely on my own. Obviously my parents knew and uncle Jack was on the case. That's what we were talking about last night. Lauren had told him he was back," Abi explained. "But it was okay because Lauren was there too. She was like my rock through it all. I told her the truth about it all, about how I felt about him."  
"What did she say?"  
"She made me realise what he had really been doing and as the years have gone on I began to understand that I never really loved him. I didn't even know what love was back then. He'd told me I loved him so I'd just assumed that it must be true. I always thought everything he said was true... It brought it all back when it came out about Whitney and Tony. I think that was when I finally got it. After I heard her talk about how Tony had made her feel I realised it was just the same way that John had made me feel."  
"I guess it kind of makes sense now, why we didn't sleep together for so long." As soon as the words left his mouth Jay wanted to hit himself for saying such a stupid thing after the news she had given him but Abi just carried on talking like it hadn't even bothered her.  
"I wanted to, honestly. I wanted to do it and prove to myself that I'd moved on but every time we went to all I could think of was him."  
"You know I'd never try to hurt you, don't you, Abs?"  
"Of course I did. Although my dad and Jack were slightly more cautious. That's why dad has always been so overprotective. He hates himself for not seeing what was going on straight away no matter how many times I've told him that he could never have known."  
"I guess that's why he was particularly pissed off when you and Ben got together, him being in jail and all."  
They both sat in silence for a few moments. Abi snuck a glance at Jay and saw the hurt on his face. Whether it was over the situation or the fact that Abi had never told him before when they were together, she wasn't sure but she did feel slightly better knowing that she had Jay. She didn't have to keep secrets from him anymore. That had always been half of their problem.  
"He could get in trouble for going near you today, right? We should tell the police."  
"No. It doesn't work like that. Technically he didn't do anything wrong today."  
"But-"  
"Jay, there's nothing you can do. Trust me. Besides, he doesn't want to hurt me."  
"You don't know that."  
"He wants us to be together."  
"Abi, you're not considering-"  
"Of course I'm not, but I think he really did care about me. I think he was actually in love with me at one point. I think he fell for me when he never meant too, even if I was only a little girl. He doesn't know that I went to the police. By the sound of it he thinks mum found out and it was her that got him locked up."  
"Then he's deluded, or even more so than I already thought he was."  
Abi shrugged. "I guess. But I think he got the point today. He finally realised that I'd grown up and I don't feel that way about him anymore. He won't be coming back."  
"You don't know that."  
"I have to believe it, Jay. I can't be living my life in the shadows, scared to go out in case he's there. I just want to be normal. All I've ever wanted to be is normal."

 _ **So Abi's secret is out! Will John return or is this the last we've heard from him and is the beginning of a new relationship?  
Let me know what you all think so far by favouring, following and dropping me a review :)**_


	5. Chapter 5

Abi yawned and stretched as she awoke. She didn't even remember falling asleep but it had obviously occurred at some point over the afternoon.  
"You're awake."  
Abi noticed Jay sitting across from her on the chair at her dressing table and then she remembered everything she had told him that afternoon. He knew the truth and it was like a weight had been lifted off her shoulders.  
"Sorry. You should have woke me."  
Jay shook his head. "You looked like you needed it. Not been sleeping well?"  
Abi curled her legs into her and wrapped her arms around her knees. "Not really. Not since Stella told me."  
"I still think we should go to the police, Abs."  
"Is that the time?" Abi interrupted reading the clock on her bedside table. "I was meant to cook dinner for Dot."  
"She looked in on you about an hour or so. She's gone to see Ian instead."  
Abi nodded silently.  
"You still owe me a drink, remember?"  
"What?"  
"The Vic. Seven o'clock we agreed, right? I think it's just about that now."  
"Right," Abi nodded although she had completely forgotten about the whole thing.  
"Are you still okay to go?" Jay checked.  
"Of course I am." She smiled brightly and then caught a glimpse of her messy hair and smudged makeup in the mirror. "Just give me half an hour to get ready and I'll meet you there."  
"Sure?"  
"Yeah. Will you get out of here or you'll be waiting for longer," Abi laughed. "I'll see you in a bit."  
Jay chuckled as he left the room and once he was gone she sprung up and began removing her makeup while trying to brush her hair at the same time.  
She wasn't sure why she was bothering so much. Jay had just seen her with her bed hair and it wasn't like he'd never seen her looking a bit rough before but Abi wanted to have a good time for once. It was the first time in ages that she'd been invited out and she wanted to make the most of it. Or maybe it was the fact that a part of her would always have feelings for Jay, but she quickly pushed that thought aside before it threatened to takeover her mind. They couldn't be together again.  
After fixing her hair and makeup, Abi changed into black jeans and a kimono with a plain white top underneath. It was coming up to half seven when she pulled on a pair of black wedges and she quickly wrote a note to Dot telling her where she was, before grabbing her keys and heading in the direction of the Vic.  
Jay was already there when she arrived with two drinks sitting in front of him. He'd been glancing at the door constantly for the last ten minutes that he'd been sitting there and jumped up straight away when he saw Abi walk in.  
"Hi," she smiled shyly, although she wasn't quite sure why.  
"You scrub up well," he complimented her.  
"Is that what you tell all the girls?" she chuckled, sitting down next to him.  
"No, just the ones I'm trying to get into bed with," he joked.  
"Jay!" she said, hitting him on the arm. "You're going to have to work harder than that if you want me to get into bed with you."  
"I know," he smiled. "So I was thinking we could head up west after this. Are you up for it?"  
"Sure. It's been ages since I've been out properly. I think the last time was with Ben when we..." she trailed of, remembering that her entire relationship with Ben had been a lie.  
"You mean that time you couldn't even make it to bed you were so drunk?" Jay asked, trying to reassure her over the situation.  
"Yeah," she laughed. "That's the one."  
Jay paused a moment before talking. "John, he didn't bother you after I'd left, did he?"  
"Can't we forget about that for one night? Please? He's not going to hurt me. I'd be down that police station now if I thought that was true."  
"Okay," Jay agreed. "What do you want to talk about then?"  
"You."  
"Me?"  
"Yeah. When was the last time we had a catch up?"  
"Before I got put on the sex offenders list," he pulled a face. "I haven't got much else to tell you."  
"Has she tried to get into contact with you?"  
"A few texts here and there but nothing more."  
"I kind of feel sorry for her."  
"You do?"  
"Well, I can see why she might do it."  
"Because I'm irresistible you mean," Jay winked.  
"Do you want to add bigheaded to that list to?" Abi stuck out her tongue. "No, I just mean...I was the same age as she is now when we started going out."  
"But this is different. I wasn't seven years older than you."  
"I know but I can understand what it's like. An older guy has a crush on you and you'll do anything to impress him." The image of John popped up in Abi's mind but she quickly blinked to get rid of it, thinking about her relationship with Jay instead.  
"Is that what you did?"  
Abi shrugged. "It's what I tried to do, whether it actually worked I don't know. I know she made a mistake but you can't blame her for wanting to be liked. Bex told me about her mum. She hasn't exactly had it easy, has she?"  
"I suppose not."  
"And you liked her, didn't you?"  
"Up until I found out she'd been lying to me."  
"Then she must have been special. I mean, she's not exactly your type."  
"What do you mean?"  
"Well, she isn't blonde." Abi said bluntly.  
Jay laughed. "You make me sound like I'd only go near blondes. It's two girls."  
"Three, if you count Lucy. I remember back in the day when you were after her. And four if you count Kitty."  
"Yeah, well, we're not counting her. I would have kissed anybody at the point."  
"Oh? It's nice to know you were so devoted to me."  
"No, I didn't mean-"  
"Jay, I'm just kidding."  
"You know I loved you, don't you-"  
"Jay," Abi drew out his name not wanting to have this conversation.  
"You might not believe it but you _were_ my world once."  
"Yeah, once maybe."  
"Alright bruv?" Ben interrupted, walking over to their table. "I didn't know you'd be here."  
Jay sighed, taking a swig of beer. "Alright?"  
"Yeah, I'm meeting Paul here in a bit. Are you two going up west?"  
"We were just going to chill here," Jay said at the same time Abi answered 'Yes."  
Jay raised his eyebrows at Abi but she refused to look at him. She didn't want to carry on alone with him for the rest of the night if he was going to keep bringing up their relationship. The experience had been painful enough for her when it happened and she hadn't let herself think about it much since.  
"Why don't you join us?" Abi asked.  
"Really?" Ben asked Abi, surprised.  
"Sure."  
"Okay, cool. I'll just wait for Paul and then we'll head off, shall we?"

"Why did you invite them?" Jay whispered to Abi, pulling her aside as they made their way into a club.  
"Why not? It's not like we're on a date, is it?"  
"Well no but-"  
"Abi, can I just say how gorgeous you are looking tonight," Paul interrupted.  
Abi put a hand to her hair. "Oh, I don't know about that."  
Paul looked over to Ben and Jay who were now deep in conversation about something else before speaking again. "Look, I wanted to apologise."  
"For what?" Abi questioned, confused.  
"I was sleeping with Ben through most of your relationship and-"  
"You don't need to apologise."  
"I do. I felt guilty the entire time and I wanted to stop but...but I was in love with him. I mean, I still I am."  
"I know, I understand, Paul. People do stupid things when they're in love. Trust me, I know better than most, which is why I forgive you. I don't blame you for what happened with Ben. I never have. If anybody is to blame then it's me for being stupid enough to get into a relationship with him in the firsts place."  
"You really mean that?"  
"Of course I do."  
Paul pulled Abi into an unexpected hug. "And you're not to blame for this either, Abs. You know that right?"  
"You're not making a move on my boyfriend, are you Abs?" Ben joked before Abi had time to answer.  
"As if I would," she smiled. "One gay was bad enough."

"Abi, wait." Jay grabbed hold of Abi's wrist and pulled her aside as they passed the cafe. It was the end of the night and they were all heading home. Paul and Ben, who hadn't noticed the other two had stopped, carried on walking.  
"What?" she asked impatiently, wanting to get out of the cold.  
"What's the matter?"  
"Nothing," Abi frowned. "I'm fine. You're the one who's been moping around all night."  
"Well," Jay crossed his arms. "Didn't you think I would have invited them if I wanted them to come?"  
"I don't see what difference it makes."  
"I thought it was just going to be us two."  
"Why? You didn't think we were going to get back together, did you?" Abi joked but then turned serious when Jay looked down at the floor. "You did, didn't you?"  
"I thought that we were getting close again."  
"Jay, I'd never get back together with you. You know that, don't you?"  
"Why not?" Jay scoffed, slightly offended.  
"You don't get it, do you?"  
"Get what?"  
"Jay, you were the only person in the world that I trusted and you broke my heart," Abi declared, trying to hold back her tears.  
"I know Kitty was a mistake but-"  
"This has nothing to do with Kitty. I got over that. I forgave you and we moved on."  
"Then what is this about?"  
"It's about you stringing me along. You only loved me when it suited you."  
"That's not true and you know it. I always loved you."  
"Yes it is! You only proposed because you didn't think you'd be able to keep quiet about Heather without me. You only said you'd move to Bolton because you didn't want the police to catch you, and then as soon as it was over with you dumped me." Abi threw her arms in the air, clearly annoyed.  
"It wasn't like that."  
"You know, after watching my parents marriage fall apart I promised myself I would never let a guy walk over me and after what happened with John," Abi said lowering her voice. "I thought nobody would ever want to be with me. Then you came along and I fell for you so hard and you broke my heart over and over again."  
"I didn't know that was how you felt."  
"Because you never asked! You were so moody half the time, moaning about the Mitchell's problems, I never got to say how I felt. I never got to tell you how much you hurt me when you kept secrets from me-"  
"I kept them from you to protect you, Abi. You know that."  
"Hey, wait," Paul whispered to Ben after realising the other two were no longer following behind.  
"What is it now?" Ben sighed.  
"We were a team, and after Kitty you promised me there would be no more secrets and all that time you were harbouring a secret crush on my best friend! How can I trust you after that? How can I ever be with you knowing that there will always be somebody better?"  
Abi turned to leave but Jay caught her hand.  
"Then tell me now. Explain it to me so I can understand."  
Abi pulled her hand back. "No, Jay. It's too late. You're too late."


	6. Chapter 6

The next day Abi woke up with a sore head and a pang of regret. Why had she said those things to Jay last night? She'd never told anybody how she'd really felt about their break up, not even Lauren, and now she felt terrible for making Jay feel like he had been an awful boyfriend to her when she knew deep down that that had never been true. She was just bitter about the break up. Jay hadn't done anything wrong accept tell her how he felt in that moment.  
She rolled over and sighed as she reached for her phone half expecting a text message from Jay and then feeling betrayed when there wasn't any sign of one. She needed to find him and she needed to talk to him. She needed to tell him the truth once and for all.

"You're up late, Jay," Billy noted as Jay wandered into the kitchen. "Good one last night, was it?"  
"No," Jay admitted, making himself a coffee. "Not exactly."  
"Why not?"  
"It's Abi."  
"Abi? That girl don't half cause a lot of problems for you two boys. What's happened now?" Billy questioned.  
"It's nothing, not really, but I stupidly thought that there might have been a chance of us getting back together again at some point and last night she straight out told me it was never going to happen."  
"Don't you think it's a bit soon?"  
"After what?"  
"Well, for both of you. You after Linzi and her after Ben."  
"But there's no chance of me and Linzi ever getting back together again, you know there isn't, so what's the point in waiting?"  
"Do you really want to jump into another relationship when you still have feelings for the last girl?"  
"Who says I still have feelings for Linzi?"  
"You liked her, a lot, didn't you? Those feelings aren't going to go away over night."  
"Well it doesn't matter, does it? Abi doesn't want anything to do with me so I might as well not bother."

The post hit the floor with a thud and Abi jumped up from the kitchen table to get it.  
Most of it was just stuff for Dot, junk, bills and letters from the church but there _was_ something for Abi. At first she didn't think much of it, her name and address was typed up so she didn't expect it to be anything more than a phone bill or a payslip from work but she was in for a shock when she opened the envelope and it's contents were revealed.  
She pulled out two plane tickets and stared at them dazed and confused, at first having no idea who it was from and why it had bee sent to her. But once she saw that the flight was for Costa Rica in North America she realised straight away who it was from. Abi ran a hand through her golden locks both scared and confused. Hadn't John got the message the day before? She didn't want anything to do with him. She didn't want to run away with him. Why couldn't he see that? All of those things that had been said, the things that they had planned, had all been so long ago and now she knew the truth of what he really was she couldn't bare to be in the same room as him for longer than a second. He was fixated with her and she was petrified that he'd pounce on her again if she refused to go away with him.  
Abi needed Jay more than ever.

Jay sighed heavily as he sat down in the chair at the Arches. Phil had gone away for a few days so there was no chance of him turning up and throwing him out again. Besides, he just needed a chat with his brother.  
"Alright, bruv?" Ben asked.  
"No, not really." Jay was slumped back in the chair feeling severely sorry for himself.  
"Is this about what happened with Abi last night?"  
Jay nodded silently.  
"I hadn't even realised you liked her again."  
"I never stopped liking her, not really. I wish I'd never broken up with her. My life would have been so much easier, so much happier now if we'd stayed together. Why was I so stupid not to see that at the time? I was so transfixed on being a lad and not wanting to be with one girl for the rest of my life that I made the worst decision I could have made."  
"I'm sorry."  
Jay looked at his adopted brother confused. "Sorry?" he repeated. "Sorry for what?"  
"Well, your break up, it was kind of my fault."  
"Your fault?" Jay looked at Ben with disbelief. "What did you have to do with it? You'd only just got back."  
"I may have said some things to Abi that got her pretty wound up."  
"Like what?" Jay asked, standing up. "What did you say?" he didn't even try to hide his anger.  
"I told her you liked Lola. I said that from an outsiders view it was obvious and she was wasting her time with you."  
"Why would you say that to her? We were just about to move away together."  
"That's why I said it. I'd only just got back and you were moving. I was jealous, Jay. You're my brother and she always came first with you."  
"Of course she did. I loved her more than anything in the world and she was always there for me when it really mattered."  
"I know, and I am sorry. I've messed her up, doing all of that to her. I don't even recognise her these days."  
Jay noticed Ben's guilty expression and felt bad for being so angry with him. Him and Abi had been having problems for a while, he'd just been too scared to admit it to her.  
"It's wasn't your fault, Ben, not really. I mean, I guess you just gave us both the kick up the backside we needed to call things off. I had been thinking of doing it for a while if I'm totally honest with you."  
"You had?"  
"Yeah..." Jay trailed off before deciding to tell Ben what had really happened with him and Abi while Ben was inside. "You don't know any of this, but I cheated on her too."  
"You what?"  
"It was a long time ago, probably about a year before we broke up, but I kissed another girl while we were on holiday with Lola, Dexter and Peter."  
"Seriously? _You_ cheated?"  
Jay nodded, ashamed of himself. "Yeah, we were going through a rough patch. Abi thought that she might be pregnant and our opinions were pretty different on it. I had too much to drink and it just happened."  
"Did she ever find out?"  
"Yeah, Dexter told her eventually. She was gutted. You and I both know what cheating has done to her and her family, and it was the worst thing I could have done to her."  
"But she forgave you?"  
"Yeah, I don't know why but she did."  
"So what's the problem? Was that something to do with your break up?"  
"I guess I always had this nagging feeling at the back of my mind when we where together about what I had done to her. She'd forgiven me but I couldn't forgive myself, and I guess I realised that I couldn't have been that committed to out relationship if I could do that to her."  
"But you carried on with her anyway?"  
"I couldn't break up with her, not then. She was doing her A Levels and everything with Max and Lucy had come out. She was going through enough and I couldn't do that to her. But then I started seeing Lola differently. I wasn't looking at her like she was a friend anymore and that was when I realised that I needed to break up with Abi. I couldn't live with myself if anything were to happened with Lola while I was still with Abi. So I'd been gearing myself up to do it for a long time, you just gave me the push I needed."  
"What about Bolton? You were going to move away with her."  
"I only said it to please her. I was never really planning on going with her, at least not until all of that Lucy stuff came out. I didn't want to hold her back. She deserved so much more than me and she could get that if she went to uni, live the life that she'd always wanted to live."  
"But she never went."  
Jay shook his head. "Nope."  
"Then what changed? Why do you like her again now?"  
"I was with Lola for a while, but then she broke up with me and Abi was there for me a lot considering it was me and Lola that had broke us up and I started to look at her differently, or at least in the way that I'd looked at her while we were together."  
"You mean to say you liked her for six months of the time that we were together?"  
Jay laughed. "Yeah, why do you think I was so keen to break you two up?"  
"Then what was Linzi?"  
"I don't know. A distraction maybe?"  
"So what are you going to do?"

Abi didn't know where to find Jay but she thought the Arches was probably a good place to start. Him and Ben were always together these days and if he wasn't there now Ben was sure to know where he was hiding. She smiled as she approached when she heard Jay's voice but quickly came to a stand still when she heard the mention of her name.  
"That isn't much I can do now. Abi doesn't want to be with me."  
"Then maybe it's for the best," Ben said. "I mean, you and Abi are in the past, right? Maybe it should stay that way."  
"Yeah," Jay agreed. "I guess. It's not worth the hassle, right? I spent half of our relationship worrying that I was going to upset her and the other half wondering when she was going to sleep with me."  
Abi took a step back like she'd just been slapped round the face. How could he say something like that after everything she had told him the day before? It was bang out of line and she knew he'd never say anything like that to her face. Maybe this was just the real Jay, a side to him that she had never seen before.  
Ben chuckled from inside the Arches. "Exactly. It's best just left alone. You'll believe it when you're off with some other girl who's name you can't even remember in a few weeks time."  
Abi turned to leave. She'd heard enough.  
She'd come here for Jay's help, for his protection but she realised that she didn't need it. The only person who could protect her from John was herself.


	7. Chapter 7

_**Hi everybody! Just a little side note from me, thank you all for your lovely reviews. I'm glad everybody is enjoying Predator as much as I am enjoying writing it so keep the reviews coming. What does everybody think of the show at the moment? Are we going to see the return of Jabi now that they're both single? Let me know what you think in the comments :)**_

It had been three days since John had sent Abi the plane tickets and she was yet to hear anything from him. It was the first time in ten years that she actually wanted to see him and of course now she couldn't get hold of him. She had no idea where he was staying and she had no number for him. It wasn't as if she could rock up to the police station asking if they knew his whereabouts. They'd think she was crazy. How was she supposed to get out of this if she couldn't even contact him? She couldn't just not turn up, he'd come after her, she was sure of it. She needed to get her point across once and for all.  
The flight was for the following day and Abi knew exactly what he wanted. They'd spent over a year of her childhood planning it. She had to meet him there. That's when they'd get on the plane and leave. That way nobody would see them together. Nobody would suspect what he was up to, what they were up to. They'd think they were just a normal couple and not a sexual predator forcing a girl he once sexually abused to move to another country with him.  
Abi sat staring at the blank space of wall in front of her from her bed. She'd been up there for the last two hours, since she'd got in from work, contemplating what to do the next day. A small part of her wanted to go. She wanted to go back to Costa Rica. It had been so amazing the first time round when she went for her scholarship back when she was sixteen but she hadn't been able to embrace it properly when she was spending half of her time worrying if Jay would want her back after she'd left him when she returned to Walford after those two months. If she left Walford, she could pursue her dreams. She could get hold of the people that she done the scholarship with and she could become a vet, a proper one, and finally do what she had always wanted to do. She'd be away from everything and everyone. She wouldn't have to walk around the square with memories from every corner of the place. She wouldn't have to think about her relationship with Ben or Jay whenever she saw them and she could leave behind the guilt she felt every time she saw the Beales for what her dad had done to them. She could meet somebody else, a boy, start her life again, fall in love and be happy. It had been such a long time since she'd been happy.  
But she knew none of that could ever happen. John would find her in the airport no matter how hard she tried to escape from his grasp and she couldn't go with him. She knew that he loved her but it was nothing but a pervert's sick fantasy of a ten year old girl. She wasn't that little girl anymore and she had to set the record straight. She had to tell him the truth once and for all, and he wasn't going to like it.

Abi waited nervously inside the airport just by the entrance so she would spot John when he came in. She was still yet to hear from him and assumed that he would meet her at the gates as she had both of their tickets, an obvious ploy from him so that she knew he wouldn't go without her. She looked around the airport trying to catch sight of him but had no luck. Abi checked her watch for the one hundredth time since she'd been there and saw it was coming up to three in the afternoon. Their flight was in under two hours. He had to show his face soon to get through security in time for their plane.  
Abi began to panic, thinking that she'd got the whole thing wrong. Maybe it was a test, a trap to see if she would turn up so John could see her feelings for him. Maybe he was watching her from a dark corner where she couldn't see him. The only reassurance she had was that she was in a crowded place where people could see them if anything were to happen, if he were to turn on her suddenly.  
Abi jumped when there was a tap on her shoulder and she spun around to face John once and for all.  
He was wearing a black jumper with the hood up to hide his face but that didn't stop her from recognising him. She'd be able to recognise him at a crowded football stadium. She'd never be able to erase that face from her nightmares.  
"I didn't think you'd come." His voice was dark and hoarse. He sounded ill and it was completely different to what she was expecting. "Come on, we don't want to miss the flight."  
He went to grab Abi's hand but she pulled away before he could get a tight grip on her.  
"No." Her voice sounded a lot stronger and much more confident than she actually felt. Inside she was scared for her life with nobody around who she could trust.  
"No?" he repeated. "Abi, we haven't got time for this. We have to go."  
"I'm not coming with you."  
John narrowed his eyes. "Then why the hell are you here?"  
"To tell you to leave me alone. I meant what I said, I don't want anything to do with you. I know what you are. I know the truth."  
"Look Abi," John began. "Whatever you parents have said to you, you can't believe it. It's just a load of lies to keep us from each other. We can't let them win. They already split us up once, we can't let them do it again."  
Abi took a deep breath. "It wasn't them."  
"What wasn't them?"  
"I went to the police and I gave my own statement. My mum never found out because she'd been spying on us or whatever shit you came up with. I told her the truth."  
John took a step back from Abi as the information settled in and she couldn't be more relieved for the space between them, even if it was only a few feet.  
"I know what you are."  
"Abi, no. You've let them come between us. I knew this would happen."  
Abi shook her head quickly. "You are a paedophile. You abused your position and took advantage of a little girl who didn't know any better."  
"Don't say things like that-"  
"Stop it!" Abi held her hand up, her voice raising slightly. She quickly regained her posture noticing that people were beginning to stare. "Stop trying to win me round. I'm not scared of you anymore. You are a vile, disgusting man and I don't want anything more to do with you."  
"You're coming with me, Abi."  
"No I'm not, and you can't force me to either because I'll tell them the truth. I'll tell everybody what you're doing. I'll scream and I'll shout and you won't be able to stop me."  
"What happened to you? What happened to the sweet little girl-"  
"I'm not a little girl anymore and I'm not naive and innocent either. You've been away for ten years and I'm not the same person you left."  
"So why are you here?" John sneered. "To give me your freedom speech? It won't change anything. I'll just come back to Walford and find you."  
"That's just it, you won't. I came here to make sure you get on that plane and never come back."  
"What?" he asked confused, although he had little reason to be so.  
"I want you to leave. I want you to go so that I never see you again, and I know you won't be able to get any money for a plane trip back. I don't even know how you got the money in the first place. Who would want to employ a paedophile? Drugs, was it?."  
"I had to take special measures, didn't I? I risked it all to be with you so no, I'm not just gonna leave because you told me to."  
Abi pulled her phone out of her pocket. "Fine," she shrugged. "I guess I'll just have to give the police a call. Let them know what you've really been up to while you've been out. I'm sure they'd love to let you finish your sentence."  
"You don't need to do that," he told her quickly, beginning to panic. "I'll go, okay? I'll get out of here."  
"Really?" Abi said slightly surprised at how easy it had been. She was half expecting to make a phone call to the police.  
"I just said I would, didn't I?"  
"You can't come back. If I ever see you again I'll be right on the phone to the police."  
John nodded. "Fine. You win, but I want you to know that I only ever done this because I loved you." He put a hand to her cheek and she turned her face to the side, not wanting to look him in the eye any longer and flinching back from his touch.  
"I loved you from the day I saw you and I never stopped loving you, Abigail Branning."

Two hours later Abi finally got back in her car after watching John get on the plane.  
She let out a massive sigh of relief which she'd been holding in from the moment she'd reached the airport and put her head in her hands.  
She'd done it. She'd finally stood up to John for the first time in her life and it felt so good to know that he would soon be on the other side of the world. She'd finally got through to him and he understood. Abi hopped he felt bad for what he'd put her through over the last ten years. She didn't believe for a second that he loved her, not anymore. He was a sick man that had taken advantage of a little girl and now he was just using her like he had done all those years ago.  
She was free.

Jay waited anxiously for somebody to open the door. He figured that Abi wasn't in or she had seen it was him and didn't want to answer. He was just about to turn around and give up when he heard the door open.  
"Oh hello, Jay," he heard Dot say. "What a lovely surprise! What can I do for you?"  
"Is Abi in?" he asked. "I was hoping to catch her."  
"Sorry, Jay. She's been out all day. She said she was going for a spa day with her friend, what's her name? Beatrice?"  
"Bernadette," Jay corrected her. "She'd never mentioned anything about a spa to me."  
Jay had a nagging feeling that something wasn't quite right. He knew Abi and he was positive that if she was going on a spa day then she wouldn't have shut up about it when he'd seen her last. She'd always been into all that girly stuff. He couldn't help but think that she was with John, that their argument had turned her crazy and she'd gone back into his arms because she felt she had nobody else. Something had happened, he knew it but then it had been a few days since he'd seen her last and Bernadette could have called her since then. Deep down he knew he was being paranoid but that didn't stop his mind from wandering.  
"It was a last minute thing I think," Dot explained. "Somebody dropped out. Do you want me to give her a message?"  
Jay shook his head. "No. I'll give her a call. Thanks anyway, Dot."  
Jay waited as Dot smiled and closed the door behind him. Dot had always been good to him, believing in him along with Patrick when nobody else would.  
He pulled out his phone, listening to the shrilling ring of it while he waited for her to pick up but instead it went straight to voicemail.  
"Abi, what the hell is going on?"


	8. Chapter 8

Abi checked her appearance one last time in the mirror. She'd perfected her eyeliner wings and curled her hair to within an inch of it's life before getting dressed into ripped skinny jeans, knee high boots and a blood red bodysuit. She was about to go on a night out with her old school friends; Holly, Chelsea and of course, Bernadette. They were planning to start of at The Albert and then make their way up West. Abi knew it was just what she needed after the last few days she had just had trying to fix things with John, but somehow she couldn't fathom the excitement for it like her friends had, who had been texting all their on their group chat. She was yet to tell anybody about her ordeal and she didn't feel much like confessing what she had done to Lauren. She knew she'd only get on at her just like she always did.  
So far Abi had ignored the voicemails Jay had left her, begging her to call him back and explain what was going on with John. Somehow he'd figured that something was up but Abi didn't feel like he had the right to ask her about it anymore, after all, she wasn't worth the hassle, right? Besides, she didn't even want to think about John now that he was out of the picture and clearly didn't want to have to explain everything all over again. John was gone now and that was all that mattered.  
A knock at the door brought Abi away from her thoughts and back to reality. She took the stairs two at a time and answered the door quickly, not bothering that Bernadette would make some witty comment about how eager and desperate she was. She was desperate, what was so bad about that?  
"Hi," she beamed at her friends, Holly, Chelsea and Bernadette.  
"Abi, you look hot!" Chelsea exclaimed. "You on the rebound or something?"  
"Something like that," Abi laughed although she had no plan to go back home with anybody that night.  
"She ought to be after what happened with Ben."  
"Bernadette!" Holly hissed. "We said we weren't going to mention him."  
Abi shook her head. "It's okay. I don't mind. I mean, I know I fucked up big time with him but I'm moving on now. I think everything is finally looking up," she added, smiling wide.  
"Isn't that what you said every time you and Jay got back together?" Bernadette said rudely.  
Abi shrugged, trying not to let Bernadette's petty comments about Jay get to her. She knew she'd always had a crush on him, she'd had even tried to get with him a few times at parties when Abi and Jay had still been together and she thought Abi wasn't looking. Of course she had been, she never took her eyes of Jay.  
"Yeah, what about Jay?" Chelsea asked. "I mean, his single, your single..." She trailed off hoping Abi was about to tell them she was going to put herself out there again.  
"It's not going to happen."  
"Why not?" Holly wined, not trying to hide her disappointment. "You two were always so perfect together."  
"So perfect that he broke up with me for my best friend, remember?"  
"Lola was never your best friend," Holly reminded her. "I mean, I would never do that to you in a million years. The girl needs to be put on a lead."  
Abi laughed but couldn't help feeling slightly sorry for Lola. She was completely different from Abi's school friends, who Lola had never been able to get along with, unsurprisingly. Abi loved them but they were all downright snobby and Lola was the exact opposite, and in all honesty, she had been there for Abi a whole lot more through all of her family problems than any of the other girls ever had.  
"C'mon, Abs. What's stopping you?"  
"How do I know that he won't just dump me again for one of you lot?" Abi asked. "Besides, who says he even wants to get back together with me? Jay broke up with me for a reason, right?"  
"Right, and now that reason is out of the picture. Jay also broke up with Lola, right?"  
"Actually she broke up with him, and his had another girlfriend since then."  
"Yeah, who was practically half his age. It was all over the papers, Abs, he won't be getting back together with her anytime soon. Trust me."  
"That doesn't mean he'll suddenly want me. Besides," Abi shrugged. "I'm meant to be moving forward, not backwards. And you guys always told me how much trouble Jay Mitchell was when we first got together. What's changed?"  
"You changed him, Abi," Holly told her. "He was like a different person when he was with you. He completely doted on you."  
"Yeah, well, a leopard never changes it's spots."

"Want another drink, Abi?" Holly slurred as she tripped over her chair trying to stand up, causing the other girls to burst out in a fit of drunken giggles.  
They'd been at The Albert for almost three hours now and none of them showed any sign of giving up and making their way up west. They'd all had far too much to drink for that now and they were having a pretty good time where they were anyway.  
Abi nodded. "Same again." She paused. "Where's Chelsea gone?" She asked, looking around the almost full bar.  
Holly pointed to another table where Chelsea was sat with a guy, their faces inches apart.  
"Makes sense," Abi nodded knowing what a flirt her friend was.  
Holly went to get another round in and Abi was left alone with Bernadette. The girl had been Abi's friend from the day she moved to Walford but it was easy to say that they didn't exactly like each other. Bernadette had always looked down on Abi's messy family problems and Abi found Bernadette far too cocky to ever actually get on with her.  
"Jay's single then?" Bernadette asked.  
"Don't you go getting any ideas," Abi pointed at her friend. "He's off limits to you."  
"Why? You said it yourself, you don't want to go back there."  
"That's not the point. You wouldn't like it if I went after one of your ex-boyfriends. Why don't I just give Josh a call now?"  
"Don't be jealous, Abi."  
"Jealous?" Abi repeated, slightly outraged by the idea. "What would I be jealous about?"  
"You can tell the girls what you want but we both know that the only reason you and Jay aren't back together is because he doesn't want you."  
"You don't know anything about me and Jay."  
"I know that he dumped you for that slaggy chav. I mean, you must have been a really shitty girlfriend if he wanted Lola over you."  
Abi stared at Bernadette, her face set hard and cold. She knew she shouldn't be shocked at what Bernadette was saying, after all it was the same way she usually treated Abi, but it hurt her to know that there was some truth in what she was saying. Jay had dumped her for Lola and she'd never really gotten over that.  
"You know I'm right, Abi."  
"No, you're not."  
Bernadette laughed too loudly and high pitched and Abi hated the sound of it.  
"Give up. He doesn't want you."  
"Is that why he asked me to make another go of things the other night then?"  
"What?"  
"You heard me." Abi smirked feeling slightly triumphant. "We went up west last week and he told me he wanted to try again."  
"You're a liar. If that was true you'd be with him now."  
"I told him no, actually. I didn't want to go back that because all he ever does is hurt me."  
"Then I guess you won't mind if I give him a call then. I wonder if he still has the number?"  
"No!" Abi almost shouted.  
"What's going on?" Holly asked, sauntering back over. "Why are you arguing?"  
"No?" Bernadette laughed, ignoring her friend's questions. "What do you mean no? He isn't yours, Abi. There's nothing you can do about it. You don't have a hold over him anymore."  
Before Abi could even think about what she was doing, she picked up her drink that Holly had just put down in front of her and tipped it over Bernadette, drenching her in coke and vodka.  
"You little bitch!" Bernadette screamed, launching for Abi so that they both ended up on the floor in a heap, kicking and screaming.  
"Oi! You two, cut it out," Sharon shouted from behind the bar but both girls showed no desire to give up or give in.  
Abi managed to scramble to her feet and pulled Bernadette by the hair to which Bernadette responded with a scream and slapped Abi across the face.  
"Abi, that's enough," Abi heard a familiar voice say from behind her but the realisation of who it was only made her more angry and she clawed at Bernadette again, all her years of hate and anger finally building up inside of her.  
"Get her out of here, Jay," Sharon begged, her voice tired of what was probably a familiar drunken brawl to her which she experienced on a daily basis.  
Jay grabbed Abi from the waist and pulled her out of The Albert so they were stood outside where a group of people were smoking, while she screamed trying to escape his grasp with no luck.  
"Jay, got off me!"  
"Not until you calm down."  
"I am calm!"  
"Clearly," Jay smirked but released his grip on her slightly. "What was that all about?"  
"Nothing."  
"Well it was obviously something."  
"Nothing that has anything to do with you. Why are you even here?" she huffed.  
"I heard the commotion and I came to see if Sharon needed a hand. I obviously didn't think for a second that it would be you causing the mess. What's got into you? These fights of yours have been getting all too frequent recently."  
"Why do you care? I'm nothing but a hassle, right?"  
Jay frowned at Abi, confused.  
"Don't look at me like that, you know exactly what I'm talking about. You spent half our relationship worrying you were going to upset me and the other half wondering when we were going to have sex, that's what you told Ben, right? How could you say that after everything I had told you just a day before?"  
Jay had the right to look guilty and stared down at his feet. "You heard that?"  
"I heard everything, and the stupid thing was I was there because I'd changed my mind about you."  
"You had?"  
"Yeah," Abi sighed, folding her arms across her exposed chest. "I'd come to apologise and I was going to tell you that I wanted to make a go of things too, but clearly you no longer have the energy for it."  
"Abi, I didn't mean it."  
Abi raised an eyebrow.  
"I mean, at the time when we were actually in a relationship that's what I thought, not all the time," he added quickly when he saw her annoyed expression. "Just on occasion, but now that I know the truth my whole view on our relationship has changed, obviously."  
"Why? Because you feel sorry for me?"  
"No-"  
"I don't need your pity, Jay. I had enough of it in Manchester, which is exactly why we left in the first place. I don't want you to feel sorry for me."  
"No, my opinion hasn't changed of you, Abs, I just want you to know that I'll always be here for you. I know you weren't really at a spa with Bernadette the other day, or whatever lie it was you spun Dot, especially after that little performance in there. You were with him, weren't you?"  
Abi sighed and looked to the floor. "Yeah, well, he's gone now so you don't need to worry."  
"Gone? Gone where?"  
"Costa Rica."  
"Costa Rica?" he repeated, his confusion showing on his face.  
"Yeah. There seems to be a parrot in here, doesn't there?"  
"And you know that for sure, do you?"  
"Yes, I watched him get on the bloody plane."  
"You were alone with him?"  
"We were in an airport, Jay. I wasn't exactly alone."  
"You know what I mean. He could have kidnapped you or something. How do you know he won't just come back?"  
Abi shrugged. "He can't afford it, and I told him I'd be straight on the phone to the police if I ever saw him again."  
"Which is exactly what you should have done in the first place, just like I told you!"  
"The police do shit, Jay. That's exactly why he was let out early in the fist place. It's why I'm in this mess now. And you sound just like Lauren! It doesn't suit you."  
"It didn't have to be like this, Abs," Jay spoke softly.  
"What other choice did I have?" she asked, her tone matching his.  
"You had me."  
"Yeah? And you really want me?"  
"Do you even have to ask me that?"  
"Well, yeah. You broke up with me-"  
"Which was a mistake, a massive mistake."  
"Then prove it." she spoke before she even realised what she was saying, before she even realised how much she wanted, needed, Jay.  
"What?"  
"Prove it. Make up to me. Show me that you really care."  
"You mean like a date?"  
Abi shrugged. "I guess."  
Jay smiled wide and failed to hide his excitement. "Abigail Branning, I'm going to give you the date of a lifetime."  
"Yeah, well," she huffed. "It's the least I deserve."  
"I meant what I said, Abi. This, John, it doesn't change the way I see you. You'll always be that fourteen year old with too much eye shadow and mascara on, trying way too hard to impress me."  
"Oh, thanks for reminding me of my embarrassment!"  
"You know you never had to try. You already impressed me just by being."  
"Yeah, well enough of the soppy stuff. I'm going home. Call me when you've got this date planned."  
Jay watched Abi walk of into the distance towards Dot's home and a shudder of excitement went up his spine. He never thought Abi would forgive him in a million years but now was his chance to make it up to her. This was his chance to win her back, for good this time.


	9. Chapter 9

"Do I look alright?" Abi asked her sister, trying to fit her whole body in the web cam so that she could see her full attire.  
"Who you trying to impress?" Lauren replied with a raised eyebrow.  
She looked down at her grey skater dress and converse and then at her hair, which was in a fishtail plait, in the laptop's web cam. "Is it too much?"  
Lauren shook her head, laughing. "No, of course not. You look great. Come on, who is he?"  
"What makes you think it's a he?"  
"Well unless you've turned into a lesbian over night, who else would you be getting dressed up for? Not being funny, Abs, but you don't really get out much these days."  
Abi looked down at her hands and smiled. "It's Jay."  
"Jay?" Lauren repeated, eyes wide, questions written all over her face. "As in Jay Mitchell?"  
"Yeah, what other Jay's do we know?"  
"Wow! It just seems a bit random, that's all. I thought you and Jay were over a long time ago. You said you were finished with him plenty of times."  
Abi shrugged. "So did I, but it just kind of happened."  
"Well I'm really happy for you, Abs."  
"Slow down, it's only the first date. Things might not even work out. There was a reason why we broke up-"  
"Of course they will. You're Abi and Jay, Walford's answer to Romeo and Juliet. I mean, look at me and Peter. We were apart for ages and now we've got a baby together. Anything could happen, don't be so pessimistic! Besides, I'm glad that you're not freaking out about John. I could never be as strong as you, Abs."  
"I'm not strong," Abi said, shaking her head. "Actually there's something I need to talk to you about-"  
"Hold on a second, Abi." Lauren paused and turned as if she was talking to somebody for a few seconds before turning back to the camera. "Sorry, Abs. I have to go. Louie hasn't been feeling well and he's just sicked up all over, Peter."  
Abi smiled but she knew it was fake. "Don't worry. Tell Louie his Auntie Abi is thinking about him."  
"I will. Have fun, and give Jay a chance."  
"Isn't that what this date is?"  
"You know what I mean. See you later."  
Lauren signed off before Abi even had a chance to reply and Abi sat back in her chair sighing loudly.  
She wanted to tell Lauren the truth about what had happened with John, after all her sister had been through almost everything with her and she knew she understood her better than anybody else ever had but she could never find the right time, or the right words, to explain. She knew that Lauren would kill her for meeting John alone and she'd tell Jack straight away, or even worse, get the first plane back to London.  
Instead, Abi let her mind wander to her upcoming date with Jay, which she'd much rather think about. She wasn't sure if she was nervous at all, or even excited, although she knew she really should be. Jay had been the love of her life once upon a time and she knew that deep down that had never really changed, despite her year long relationship with Ben. So what if her tummy wasn't turning at the thought of him? Abi just put that down to her feeling so comfortable around Jay. The three years they spent together wasn't just going to vanish, no matter how much Abi wished it would when he'd first broken up with her 18 months ago.  
A knock on the door broke Abi away from her thoughts and she quickly straightened her dress and checked her appearance in the mirror one last time before answering the door.  
"Good afternoon, Miss Branning."  
Abi giggled and took the bunch of roses that Jay was passing to her. "You've pulled the stops out, haven't you?"  
Jay shrugged. "You deserve it."  
"I hope you're not going to keep up with these cheesy chat up lines all day," Abi said, walking past him. "You'll never get a second date."  
Jay chuckled as he followed behind Abi. "Do you want to know where we're going?"  
"Surprise me," Abi smiled.  
Jay held out his arm for Abi to take. "Follow me."

"Oh my god," Abi breathed. "I can't believe you've done all of this for me."  
Abi looked around at the play area where Jay had laid out a picnic complete with champagne, strawberries dipped in chocolate, sandwiches, cocktail sausages and scotch eggs. She also noticed a single rose in a vase and Jay's iPod and speakers playing some romantic album, similar to the one that had been playing on that Valentines day, the day Abi lost her virginity to Jay.  
"It's like the first one, isn't it?"  
"The first one?" she repeated. "The first what?"  
"Our first date," Jay told her. "It was here, on the swings."  
"You were supposed to buy me chips," Abi recalled, taking a seat on the picnic blanket. "But you forgot your wallet, after turning up half an hour late. With no apology, might I add."  
"The gentleman as always," Jay laughed.  
"You asked me if I liked George Michael." Abi said, joining in with his laughter, thinking back to the days when they were both so naive and innocent.  
"Heather was giving me some tips beforehand. She told me you should _always_ ask your date if they like George Michael. Solid advice."  
"Deal breaker, huh? Who knew Jay Mitchell would need dating tips?"  
"I'm not the big shot you think I was."  
"Thought, I figured that out pretty quickly when you took forever to kiss me."  
"Hey!" Jay punched Abi in the arm lightly. "I can't help it if I was nervous around you."  
"I made you nervous?" Abi asked softly.  
"Of course. I fancied the pants of you."  
"Don't tell my dad that," Abi said, raising an eyebrow. "He'll definitely think you were only after sex then."  
Jay laughed. "Well, you were worth the wait."  
"Don't be weird," she said, bumping him with her shoulder, slightly embarrassed. "Cringe doesn't suit you. We're not that kind of couple...You know, I've never been more nervous for anything than that night."  
"It's understandable after what had happened-"  
"No, it wasn't that. I mean, he was why I waited but he wasn't why I was nervous."  
"Then what?"  
"It was you."  
"Me?" he repeated.  
"Sure, don't sound so surprised. I mean, you'd probably been with all of these girls before me and there I was, with not a clue what I was doing and-" Abi stopped when she noticed Jay was laughing. "What? What's so funny?"  
"That's what you thought? That I'd slept with loads of girls before you."  
"Well maybe not _loads_ , but-"  
"I was a virgin too, Abs."  
"What?" she asked, taken aback.  
"You were my first."  
"But I thought you'd said..." she trailed off, slightly confused.  
"I just said that to impress you. I was just as nervous as you were. I was completely inexperienced, even if I was a Mitchell."  
"Well now I feel like an idiot," she scoffed. "Why didn't you tell me that before, calmed my nerves?"  
Jay shrugged. "Because you're you."  
Abi frowned. "What do you mean?"  
"You might have thought I was cool but really I was nowhere near as cool as you. I mean, you were like the most popular kid in your year. When I was at school nobody ever gave me much notice, and if they did it was because I was in trouble for something."  
"I was not."  
"Of course you were. You were ridiculously smart and pretty and everybody wanted to be friends with you. Don't believe me?" Jay asked when he saw her expression. "That party you took me too, Bernadette's seventeenth I think it was, you spoke to everybody and every guy did a double take when you walked past them. And what was he's name? That guy who kept trying it on with you?"  
"Owen Walker," Abi reminded him, laughing.  
"That's the one. I basically had to step between you so he didn't kiss you. I was ridiculously jealous that night. See, I found you just as intimidating as you found me."  
"We were the worst couple." Abi shook her head, smiling.  
"Yeah, but we were kind of the best too, right?"  
Abi bit down on her bottom lip and looked at Jay. His eyes, that dark shade of green, had always been her favourite and she could feel them staring into her soul now as he looked back at her.  
"Thank you, Jay. You proved it."  
"Ah, well, this isn't everything yet."  
"It's not?"  
"Of course not. I got you a present," he said handing an envelope.  
Abi looked at him, sceptical, while ripping open the envelope and pulling out a couple of tickets.  
"I thought we could go up West End. They're for Hairspray. That's your favourite right because-"  
"Link always turns me on no matter who's playing him," Abi said at the same time as Jay, laughing slightly amazed that he'd even remembered she'd said that. It had been a drunken night of passion when Max went away for work and Lauren was round a friends. They'd had a free house and it was one of her favourite nights they'd spent together over their entire relationship.  
"You know what, Jay Mitchell. You are the absolute best."

"So, have I done enough?" Jay asked a couple of hours later as he walked Abi back to Dot's.  
"Oh, I don't know. I was really expecting a weekend in Paris, dinner under the stars, a surprise appearance from Taylor Lautner."  
"You cheeky mere!" he nudged her like she had done to him earlier.  
"It was perfect, Jay. Thank you, really."  
"I wanted to make it up to you. Not just what I said to Ben but the break up too. Losing you was the biggest mistake I'd ever made and breaking your heart was the worst thing I could have done."  
"You haven't lost me, Jay. You'd never lost me."  
Jay lent into Abi, knowing the moment was right, and closed his eyes as his lips met hers. Upon reaching Dot's, he walked Abi to the concrete wall and lent her against it, deepening the kiss. It was as if nothing had ever changed. She still smelt like roses and tasted like strawberries, her lips were still soft and fitted his like a jigsaw puzzle. She was perfect to him in every way possible.  
He felt Abi smiling into their kiss and he pulled away.  
"Best date ever?"  
She nodded, her eyes still closed. "Best date ever."  
"So, what now?"  
Abi shrugged. "Date number two?"  
"Date number two," Jay agreed. "But don't go getting your hopes up. I've spent half my savings on today."  
Abi laughed, shaking her head. "You do too much, Jay."  
Jay shrugged. "You deserve the world, and I had a point to prove."  
"Well you proved it. I better go," Abi said, looking over her shoulder. "Dot will be home soon. I'll call you later."  
Jay nodded and pecked her on the lips. "I'll be waiting."  
Abi watched Jay walk away into the distance, smiling to herself, revelling in the perfect day she'd just had, and then turned away, pulling her keys out of her pocket and letting herself into the house.  
"Anybody home?" she called out even though she knew Dot was still at the laundrette and Jack was at number five doing some construction work.  
She turned around to take off her coat and put her keys down when she heard somebody move behind her and assumed the face paced movement meant it was Jack.  
"I didn't think you'd be home. I'm-" She stopped mid sentence as she turned back and saw her worst nightmare standing right in front of her.  
"You didn't think I'd actually go, did you, Abi?"


	10. Chapter 10

_**I'm sorry this chapter is a day late. I've just gone back to school after exams and completely lost track of time. For those of you who don't know, I (try to) update every Wednesday and Sunday. I hope everybody enjoys this chapter, it's a biggie, and let me know what you think in the reviews below :)**_

Abi took a step back away from John, pushing herself against the table in the hallway, her hand reaching into her pocket for her mobile phone.  
"I told you to go," Abi said, trying to make her voice sound strong and confident but failing.  
"And now I'm back. I'm not going to let some little kid tell me what to do, okay? You are coming back to Costa Rica with me and-"  
"No, no I'm not."  
John narrowed his eyes and Abi could tell from his expression that he was not happy with her. She had seen that expression many times over the two years that she was with him. This was the John she knew.  
"You will do as you're told." He was shouting now, really raising his voice, and Abi was glad nobody else was home to hear the racket. "I am the boss around here, Abi, and I won't have _you_ disrespecting _me_ anymore, you got that?"  
Abi finally reached grasped hold of her phone in her pocket and attempted to pull it out discretely so that she could call the police, Jay, anyone, but it was to late, John had seen what she was doing.  
"What is that?"  
"What?" Abi asked, attempting to sound oblivious.  
"In your pocket, Abi, what is it?"  
"Nothing."  
"Show me."  
"No, I'm not going to-"  
"Show me, Abi," he shouted once again. "Now!"  
Reluctantly, Abi pulled out her mobile phone and held it in the palm of her hand. Before she had time to act, John nudged her hand, sending the phone flying to the other side of the hallway, completely out of Abi's reach.  
She began to panic. Before she'd had the knowledge that the phone was on her, there was an escape, a way out, but now that that was gone her heart started to beat faster and her breathing became more sporadic. She was trapped.  
John tilted his head in the direction of the living room and Abi knew that he wanted her to go in there. She did what he said, petrified of what would happen to her if she didn't, and followed him into the living room.  
"Don't even bother trying."  
"Trying what?" Abi asked.  
"To escape," John shrugged. "You won't get very far when I have this." Abi watched as John pulled a gun from his belt and aimed it at her. "One move, and you're dead."  
"You wouldn't kill me," Abi said more to herself than him, wanting to believe it more than anything.  
"No, as long as you do what I want."  
John put the gun down on the coffee table and took a step towards Abi. Instinctively, she moved away but then quickly remembered the gun in between them and refrained herself from moving any further. This was it. He was going to touch her or kill her and right now she wasn't sure which she would prefer.  
"It's been a while, huh, since we last did this. I might be a bit out of practise."  
Abi's body tensed and her eyes flickered closed when she felt John's hand on her arm, stroking her softly and it was like she had deja vu.  
"Don't be scared," he whispered so close to her ear that her hair moved with the touch of his breath. "It's only me." But that was what scared her the most.  
John moved his hand to Abi's neck and began to leave a trail of kisses down her jaw line. Death was looking like a much more pleasant experience right now. She wanted to be sick. She wanted to move as far away from him as humanly possible and run until her lungs gave up on her but she knew what would happen to her if she tried. Up until now she would have risked it, she would have run and waited for him to kill her but now things were different. There was somebody out there that needed her, that maybe even loved her, and she couldn't put him through the pain of losing her.  
It was like she was ten years old again, helpless with nobody to turn to.  
With her eyes still closed, Abi could feel John's after hand wander down to her leg as he laid her down on the sofa. He bunched her dress up in his fist, moving it out of the way and in that moment Abi froze. She couldn't push John off her even if she wanted to. She was young and he was old. She was scared and he was confident. She was weak and he was strong.  
"You don't know how long I've been waiting to do this," John said, his breathing fast and erratic.  
Abi was pretty sure she had an idea. It had probably been the same amount of time that she had been wishing he was given life imprisonment.  
She allowed her eyes to open and stared up at the ceiling, concentrating on that rather than where John was putting his hands.  
At the feel of him pulling down her underwear, she remembered the lamp sitting on the table behind her head and something clicked inside of her. Impulsively, she stretched her arms as if she was enjoying John's touch and at the sign of her movement, John's head moved back to her neck where he began to leave a trail of kisses. Abi saw this as her moment and quickly grabbed the lamp and pulled it with full force, hitting John over the head so he fell off her body and onto the floor.  
Before he could get back to her, she scrambled off the sofa and moved to the other side of the room, away from him and his prying hands.  
"You stupid, stupid girl," John said. He was on all fours, looking at the floor and not Abi and she could that he was thinking of killing her.  
Before she could even think about what she was doing, Abi picked up the gun from the table and held it out in front of her, aiming it at John.  
He looked up when he heard her sudden movement and smiled. "You're not going to shoot me, Abi."  
"Take another step towards me and you might just find out," she spoke, her voice shaking. She wasn't even going to try and hide her nerves anymore.  
John stood up and faced Abi. "You wouldn't, not my Abi. Not my little innocent Abi."  
"I mean it, don't move any further."  
"I fell in love with you the day I saw you-"  
"Your sick," Abi shouted, interrupting him. "I was nine years old. Nine years old and you did that to me. You ruined my life. That's not the way you treat somebody you love."  
"Don't pretend you didn't feel the same way too, Abi. I know you better than you know yourself."  
"You know nothing about me. All you know is what you want to hear."  
"It doesn't have to be like this, Abs-"  
"Don't call me that."  
"If you just pass me the gun we can forget that this little episode even happened and go back to what we were doing, and afterwards we'll get on that plane and leave. Wherever you want to go, I'll take you. I'll do it for you."  
"I want to stay here," Abi told him firmly, tears streaming down her face. "I want to carry on with my life, with you behind bars where you belong. I don't want anything to do with you."  
"You don't mean that." John took a step towards her.  
"I'm warning you, you come any closer and I'll do it."  
"What did I ever do to you to deserve this, Abi? All I've ever done is treat you right and this is how you repay me? I thought we were soul mates."  
"Yeah? Well you thought wrong."  
"Come on, we can sort this."  
John moved towards her, closing the gap between them.

Jay was talking to Ben when he heard the gunshot go off. He had bumped into him on the way home from Dot's and was just telling him about the date he'd taken Abi on, and the kiss that they had shared when the noise startled them both.  
"What the hell was that?" Ben spoke first. "It sounded like it came from Dot's."  
"Abi!" Jay said, only just above a whisper, before running in the direction of the house, banging on the door as soon as he reached it. "Abi? Are you in? Abi?"  
No reply came, but the sound of another gun shot encouraged him to begin kicking at the door, willing it to open, until he heard Ben come up behind him.  
"Jay, what's the matter?"  
"I need to get in, Abi's in trouble."  
"Move out of the way," Ben told him and with a couple more kicks managed to get the door of Dot's home open.  
"Call 999," Jay ordered as he pushed past him into the house. "Tell them John Smith has come back for Abi."  
"Who?"  
"Just do it, Ben."  
He stopped at the doorway of the living room when he saw Abi with a gun, which dropped to the floor with a thud when she raised a shaky hand to her mouth.  
"Oh my god," she breathed and Jay entered the room.  
"Abi, it's okay. I'm here. It's okay."  
He took in the sight of the living room over Abi's shoulder as he pulled her into his chest, feeling his t-shirt quickly grow damp with her tears. There was John, lying on the floor in front of where Abi had been standing, a wound in his leg and another in his chest, and a pool of blood dripping from both wounds on to the floor like a puddle.  
"I've got you. He's gone, okay? The police are on their way. It's over now."  
"I killed him," Abi said but it was no more than a whisper. "I shot him, Jay."  
"I know," he pulled her out of the hug and held her face in his hands, looking straight into her eyes and seeing how terrified she was. "It's going to be okay, I promise you."  
"But the police-"  
"We're going to tell them it was me. We need to get out story straight before they get here, okay? I heard a scream and I knocked the door down. When I came in he was on top of you and I killed him."  
"No."  
"Abi, we don't have a choice."  
"I'm not going to let you take the cover for this. It was all me. I killed him and I'm going to have to face the consequences for it. I can't let you do this, Jay."  
"Abi, you're not in the right frame of mind right now-"  
"It's not your choice, Jay, and this isn't your battle to fight. I have to face up to what he has done to me once and for all."


	11. Chapter 11

The next few hours went past in a blur for Abi. She was dazed and confused by the time the police arrived 10 minutes later and Jay was forced to take over. Ben returned home and the couple were shuffled out of the living room, which had now become a crime scene with police tape all over the walls and forensics inside, by the officers and moved into the kitchen to give their statements.  
"So," the officer began. "Who wants to start?"  
Jay looked over at Abi, who was silently staring at her hands that were clasped on her lap. Usually, the officer had told them beforehand, they would have had to have been separated when giving their statements but due to the shock and trauma Abi was clearly in they had been allowed to stay together. Jay could lie, he could tell them that it was him who shot John but he knew Abi would only contradict him and then she could end up in even more trouble, both of them could.  
"Have you heard of that guy in there?" Jay asked, his anger building up the minute they were sat down in the kitchen. "John Smith?"  
Abi flinched when she heard his name and sensing her discomfort, Jay tried to calm down despite feeling the most angry he had ever felt in his lifetime just thinking about what the pervert could have done to Abi had she not have been so strong, so brave.  
"He was put in prison when Abi was ten," Jay told him when the officer showed no sign of recognition. "For sexually abusing her when she was a student and he was a teacher. They let him out of prison a few weeks ago and told Abi they couldn't help her if he turned up again and now this is what happens. I thought you lot had a job to do. I was clearly wrong."  
Jay slumped back in his chair making sure the officer knew he was pissed off and annoyed.  
"Please Mr Mitchell, I can see that you are angry but if you weren't at the crime scene then I'll need to have Abi take a statement, not you."  
"And do you think she's in the right frame of mind to do that now? She was almost raped and she had to murder the guy just to get him off her-"  
"Jay, please," Abi's voice was just above a whisper and Jay's heart broke hearing it. He'd never seen her like this before, so alone and broken. He knew he hurt her when he broke up with her but the expression on her face told him that this was ten times worse. "I can do it." She looked up at Jay and attempted a smile and he squeezed her hand beneath the table in response, trying to reassure her. "So much for a great first date, huh?"  
Jay laughed and kissed her on the forehead. "It was still perfect."  
"Right, Abi," the officer interrupted them. "Can you take me from the beginning?"  
So she did. She told the officer all about coming home from her date and sensing somebody behind her, assuming it was only Jack or Dot and then realising it wasn't. She told him how she had tried to call the police to begin with and then how he had got rid of her phone, knowing she was up to something. She told him how he had taken the gun out almost right away to scare her, warn her that if she tried anything she'd be dead. She told him, in much less detail, how he had kissed her and pushed her on to the sofa, how his body had felt so heavy on top of hers it was like she was suffocating underneath the weight of it. Then finally, she told him how she had picked up the lamp and hit him over the head with it, how he'd laughed at her when she had done so, telling her she was stupid, and then how she had picked up the gun and shot him when he began to get closer and closer to her. Once in the leg and once again in the chest when the first didn't stop his advances. The first bullet hadn't meant to kill him, she had only wanted to get him away from her but he didn't seem to care about that. Abi wasn't a murderer, she never wanted to end his life. She just wanted to feel safe.  
Through all of this, Jay sat next to her silently, listening intently to what she was saying, holding her hand through it the whole way. He couldn't even begin to imagine how Abi must have felt while John was touching her, threatening her, how scared she must have been. But although she was still shaking now, she had done it. She had overcome her worst fear, her biggest nightmare and he realised he had a habit of underestimating her. She was strong and brave and beautiful. He loved her now more than he ever had before.  
"I'm going to need you to come down the station tomorrow to give me another statement," the officer told her.  
"Again?" Jay asked. "She just told you everything."  
"I know, but we'll need to have a recorded version for court. It seems the situation is much more complicated than we had first imagined."  
"Court?" Abi repeated. "What's going to happen now?"  
"I really can't tell you anything more until I've spoken to my colleagues. Have you got a place to stay tonight? This is a crime scene now."  
"You can stay with me," Jay reassured her.  
"I can't ask you and Billy to do that," she said, shaking her head.  
"You don't have to."  
The next fifteen minutes consisted of Abi begin chaperoned around the house by another police officer while she got together a few things to take to Jay's with her. She packed a bag full of clothes, underwear and toiletries aimlessly, not really concentrating on what she was doing, her thoughts wandering to the other corners of her mind. She was scared but she couldn't help the massive sense of relief she felt knowing that John couldn't hurt her anymore, knowing she could be safe in Walford with Jay, alone.  
"All packed?" Jay asked, coming up behind her.  
Abi nodded and then paused. "What about Dot?"  
"Dot?" the officer repeated.  
"Her grandma," Jay explained. "It's her house. I'll give her a ring."  
"Actually, I think it would be best if I spoke to Mrs Branning myself when she arrives."  
"Why?" Jay demanded. "She isn't going to have a clue what is going. Abi never told anybody about John."  
"Except for you it would seem, Mr Brown."  
Jay narrowed his eyes at the officer. "I don't know what you're deal is here but Abi has done nothing wrong. It was self defence."  
"That is what she says, Mr Brown, but I'm afraid there are no witnesses."  
"I'm a witness."  
"You arrived after Mr Smith's death. I'm afraid you just can't account for it."  
"This is ridiculous. Abi is innocent and you-"  
"Jay," Abi interrupted. "Please, can we just go?"  
Jay looked down at Abi and sighed. "Yeah, of course we can."  
Abi nodded and allowed herself to be steered out of the house. Jay noticed her glance at the living room and watched as she turned her body away from it as they went past. He put his hand on the small of her back and led her out of the door.  
"You'll be hearing from us soon, Miss Branning."  
Abi only nodded again and continued to walk in silence.  
A small crowd had gathered outside Dot's and Jay noticed a few regulars; Kim and Denise, the Carters, Stacey and Martin. The view felt familiar to Jay. They were the same stares and the same whispers he himself had experienced after the news came out about him and Linzi.  
"Haven't you lot got anything better to be doing?" Jay asked, raising his voice slightly.  
"We thought something had happened to Dot," Mick explained. "We were worried."  
Jay put his arm around Abi and led her back to Billy's house. It was a short walk but he was still worried about her silence. Jay wanted to distract her in someway but he just didn't know how. It was a sensitive situation and he didn't even know how to begin to address it.  
"Welcome home," Jay said, opening the door, and then nearly kicking himself for saying something so inconsiderate at a time like this.  
"Thanks," Abi replied, her voice barely above a whisper.  
"I'll take the sofa. You can have my bed."  
"No, I can't let you do that."  
"Abs, you've had an eventful day. You need a good nights sleep."  
"Ready for my big day at the police station tomorrow?" Abi sighed and sat down on the sofa. "Everything is such a mess."  
Jay sat down beside her. "It's going to be okay."  
"Jay, I killed a man. I'm a murderer."  
"No, you're not. Abi, don't use that word."  
"It's true," she shrugged.  
"You're no more a murderer than I am a paedophile. What you did was self defence. It wasn't murder and it wasn't man-slaughter. Don't listen to anything those pricks say."  
"But that might not be how the jury see it when it goes to trial."  
"Who says it's going to go to trial?"  
"Of course it's will go to trial. A man was killed, Jay."  
"Yeah, a disgusting man who took advantage of his position and sexually abused one of his underage pupils. Abi he was either going to rape you, kidnap you or murder you. You had no other choice."  
"I could have done what he said. I could have gone with him."  
"Why? He deserved to die."  
"I have blood on my hands, Jay. If I had just done what he said then none of this would have happened."  
Abi stood up and walked to the other side of the room while running a hand, which Jay could see was clearly shaking, through her blonde locks.  
"I never thought I would be capable of murder. I never wanted to be that person, be just like my dad or Derek."  
"And you're not. Abi, please, just listen to me." Jay stood up and took Abi's hands in his to try and stop them from shaking. "I know you feel guilty. I know you're scared. But you don't have to be, not anymore. John has gone, he's dead and that was because he deserved to die after what he had done to you for all these years, not because you killed him. If this goes to trial-"  
"When."  
" _If_ , the jury will see exactly what I see. An innocent girl who was tortured with the abuse of this man for years and was finally able to defend herself against him. Abi, it was the only way and there may not be a witness but there is a record of what he done to you all those years ago. Nothing is going to happen to you. All those what ifs don't matter because all of them would have involved you living a life of abuse, a miserable life and I couldn't even begin to imagine how awful that would have been/ I don't want to imagine it."  
Abi shook her head as a stray tear fell down her cheek.  
"Abi, talk to me."  
"It doesn't matter if I'm found not guilty. None of that matters because it won't stop it. Every time I close my eyes I see him standing over me and all of those memories from when I was younger come back. He might be dead, Jay, but I'll never be rid of him. It won't ever stop."  
"You've done it before, haven't you? I mean, eventually after you knew he was behind bars and you were safe, you were able to move on."  
"Only because of you," Abi looked him in the eye for the first time in hours. "You showed me that it didn't have to be that way forever. You saved me, Jay."  
"And I'll save you again, and I'll keep on saving you because it's what you do when you love somebody."  
"You..you love me?"  
"Abi, I am so in love with you that it's excruciating. But I will always be here for you no matter what and I'm going to protect you. I'll never let anything happen to you, I promise."


	12. Chapter 12

**_Hey everybody! My apologies again for updating so late. I am having a major mind blank at the moment and I'm not really too sure which direction I want to take this story into but hopefully I'll come up with a plan soon so I can update more regularly. I've just been onto chapter 11 and seen that it updated totally weirdly so if you had trouble reading it the first time, I have since updated it so it should all make sense now. If it still hasn't please let me know in the reviews so I can fix it. Please please please keep giving me your awesome reviews. I love hearing back from you guys and if you have any ideas please tell me and they may give me some inspiration :)_**

Abi woke up with a start the next morning when she heard a loud, continuous bang. She hadn't slept much at all. Every time she had closed her eyes she saw John's face staring back at her and when she had eventually found sleep she dreamed of him touching her just like he used to. Abi rolled over and looked at the clock which told her it was almost ten, it seemed that she had managed to get at least three or four hours of sleep in. Almost like a zombie, Abi crawled out of bed, Jay's bed, and wandered into the living room where Jay was now getting up from the sofa where he had insisted on sleeping despite Abi's many protests.  
"Morning, I was then about to come in and check on you. You've been asleep for hours."  
"I've been _trying_ to sleep for hours."  
Jay looked at her apologetically and was about to say something else when he was interrupted by the banging noise that had got Abi out of bed in the first place.  
"I better answer that," Jay told her as he headed towards the front door.  
"Is Abi here?" a female voice demanded.  
Abi didn't even have to think about who it was, the voice was so familiar to her that she recognised it immediately. Within seconds her sister was standing in front of her, pulling her into a hug.  
"Lauren, what are you doing here?" Abi asked.  
"What do you think I'm doing here? Are you okay?"  
Abi pulled away from her sister's embrace. "How did you know?"  
"Dot rang me last night wanting to know if I knew a John Smith. She said she didn't have a clue where you were and the police wouldn't let her in. I got the first plane down here. I thought something terrible had happened, Abs. I thought...well it doesn't matter what I thought. You're here."  
"Something terrible has happened, Lauren. John is dead. I killed him."  
"I know. I've spoken to the police down at Dot's."  
"They're still there?"  
Lauren nodded. "The place is swarming with them, but that doesn't matter right now. Abi, why didn't you tell me he was back? You promised me you'd let me know if anything happened."  
"I'm sorry, I didn't want to worry you."  
"Abi, you're my sister. You know I would have been on a plane and down the police station with you the minute we thought there was a problem. Why couldn't you have just been selfish for once?"  
"I was selfish. I killed him because-"  
"You killed him because you had no other choice. Abi, look at me," Lauren demanded, putting her hands on Abi's shoulders. "Don't you dare blame yourself for this. I know you feel guilty for killing somebody but you are not a bad person."  
"Of course I am."  
"Abs, you would never intentionally go out to kill an innocent person. John's death was not intentional and neither was he innocent. It was self defence and that pervert deserved to die for the years of hell he put you through. He was a vile, disgusting man."  
Abi sighed. "I'm going to get dressed and then we can do something, yeah? Where's Louie?"  
"In New Zealand, he's with Peter."  
"You're not staying for long then?" Abi asked, failing to hide her disappointment.  
"I'll stay as long as you need me."  
"But what about Peter and Louie?"  
"They'll survive, I hope. Seriously, you're my main priority at the moment, Abs."  
Abi gave Lauren a small smile and turned in the direction of the bathroom to shower and dress.  
Lauren turned to face Jay. "You should have phoned me."  
"Abi didn't want me to."  
"Abi doesn't know what's best for her. You should have phoned me and I could have fixed things before it got to this."  
"And what would you have done?" Jay questioned, slightly pissed off that Lauren was insinuating he had done nothing to try and help Abi or get through to her this whole time. "Killed the guy yourself?"  
"If it was to save my sister then yeah."  
Jay sighed and sat down on the sofa. "Do you think I like seeing her like this? It kills me every time I look at her to know that I didn't protect her, I didn't keep her safe. I know I should have been harder on her, made her go to the police but it's done. There's nothing we can do to change what has happened no matter how hard I wish we could."  
"You're right," Lauren agreed, sitting down beside him. "All we can do now is be there for Abi, help her, whatever she needs. We can't let her go on a downward spiral, Jay, we can't."  
"And we won't. I'm serious Lauren, I know what I want now and that's Abi. I'm not going to lose her again."  
"Yeah? Well you better not by lying to me Jay Brown or I will be the first person to give you an inclining of just how you make my sister feel."  
Jay smiled although he knew Lauren wasn't joking around. "I have no doubt of that."  
"Good. Jay, I need to know she'll be alright when I go back to New Zealand."  
"And she will be. I'll make sure of it."

A few hours later Abi found herself outside the police station for the first time since she had been giving a statement against her dad. She felt weird being back again, almost guilty for knowing what she had done to Max, but this time she knew she was here for herself. She had to do this or she might risk being sent down and she knew there was no way she would survive in prison a day in prison, let alone years. At least this time she had her sister by her side.  
"Are you ready?"  
"No, but I don't think I'll ever be."  
"In that case then there is no time like the present. You can do this."  
Abi nodded and followed her sister's lead in to the police station.  
"My sister is here to give her statement regarding the death of John Smith," Lauren told the officer behind the desk.  
"Name?"  
"Abi, Abigail, Branning," Abi spoke up, trying to sound brave but feeling the exact opposite inside.  
"Follow me."  
There was something about the interview room that Abi had always hated. She figured there ought to be separate ones; one for the innocent and one for the guilty; that way the innocent wouldn't feel so nervous and intimidated about giving their statement. The blank walls wouldn't feel so much like a prison cell and the officers wouldn't look so stern and scary, like they were going to pin you up against the wall and put handcuffs on your wrists at any second. But when Abi began to think about it as she sat down waiting in the room alone with her sister she wasn't too sure which person she was today. The innocent or the guilty. Lauren and Jay both kept telling her she was innocent but she knew deep down she was guilty of murder no matter what the guy had ever done. Suddenly the room started to feel very fitting for her situation.  
"Abi, thank you for coming in to see us." The door opened and Abi recognised the officer straight away when she entered. DCI Marsden was notorious for trying to bring down the Mitchell's and Abi was able to have some experience with her while she was a part of the clan.  
DCI Marsden pulled up a chair and beside her sat a man she had never seen before. He looked young, almost too young to be taking on a big case like this, but he smiled at Abi when he sat down like he was on her side, making her feel ten times more comfortable and reassured.  
"Miss Branning, I'm sorry but I'm going to have to ask you to leave," Marsden told Lauren.  
"What? Why?"  
"We can't have anybody in here that may influence, Abi. Her solicitor will be here soon to-"  
"But she needs me. Don't you think she's been through enough already these last few days? She gave you a statement yesterday and now you want her to go through it all again."  
"Lauren, I'll be okay," Abi told her, trying to reassure herself more than her sister. "I promise."  
"Okay, fine. I'll just be outside if you need me."  
Abi nodded and a few minutes later a solicitor came in and sat by Abi's side. Immediately, Marsden hit the record button on the tape clearly wanting to get the interview over and done with. She wasn't the only one.

Jay had checked his watch four times in the last fifteen minutes. He was going out of his mind with worry knowing that Abi was currently in the police station giving her statement about that disgusting man. He'd already listened to what she had had to go through yesterday and he didn't know how she could stand to do it all over again.  
He'd never met anybody quite like Abi and he hadn't realised it until a month ago. She was braver than he could have ever imagined when they had first got together those five years ago back in 2011. As much as he hated to admit it now, when he was sixteen he only really got with her because she was the first girl to take any interest in him for months and he was beginning to feel a bit lonely. She was just the fourteen year old school girl who seemed like a bit of a laugh. It was only after that, when he really got to know Abi, that he fell in love with her, which of course didn't take very long. She was funny and smart and beautiful and he couldn't believe that somebody like her who was so cool and popular at school could ever be interested in him and his 'gangster' lifestyle he had lived up until that point. He had that feeling now as he sat there waiting for her to return from the police station anxious and nervous.  
Jay almost fell of his chair when he finally heard the key in the lock a few minutes later and the door opened to reveal Abi. Usually he could read her like a book but when she was standing there in front of him he didn't quite know what to make of her expression. She looked aloof almost, distant, like she didn't quite know where she was and how she had got there.  
"So," Jay began, standing up. "How did it go?"  
Abi nodded. "Fine."  
"Yeah? I bet you're glad you got it all done and over with, right?"  
"I wish people would stop saying that!" Abi said, her voice raising slightly, causing Jay to take a step back away from her. The shock of her little outburst showed on her face seconds later when she realised what she had just done.  
"Hey," Jay said soothingly. "It's okay. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to upset you."  
Abi shook her head. "It's me that should be apologising. It's just, I know it's not over because there's still the trial to go and-"  
"There might not be a trial," Jay interrupted her.  
Abi shrugged. "You're right, there might not be one but right now I have to assume that there will be because I don't think I can take anymore unexpected surprises." A tear began to run down Abi's face but she quickly brushed it away hoping Jay hadn't seen. "I just want everything to go away. I want to go back to when I was fifteen and the memory of John was pushed to the back of my mind, when the only thing I ever had to worry about was what to wear when we went out for dinner or whether you were going to dump me because you'd seen me chatting to Nathan from school and thought I'd been cheating. I hate feeling like my life is turning to shit and there is nothing I can do to stop it."  
Out of nowhere, the tears came. It was like a stream, no, an ocean and once she started Abi couldn't stop it. It had been so long since Abi had really allowed herself to let all of the emotion go. She couldn't show any sign of weakness when she was a Mitchell and that motto had stuck with her up until now. She was so done with bottling everything up. She needed to get it all out before she exploded.  
As if on cue, Jay was moving towards her, pulling her into his chest before she could protest and letting her leave snotty tears all over his t-shirt.  
"I'm sorry."  
"Don't you dare apologise, Abi. You have nothing to be sorry for."  
Abi pulled back and looked up at Jay. "Yes I do," she smiled almost shyly. "I've ruined your top."  
Jay laughed and pulled Abi back against his chest. It was their safe place here. Nothing could touch either of them when they were together. "You could ruin my whole wardrobe and I'd still think you were Cheryl Cole, no, better than Cheryl Cole. Mila Kunis!"  
Abi looked up at Jay, biting her lip. "I never said it yesterday but I love you too, idiot."  
Jay lent down and pecked her on the lips. "Well that's good, otherwise we'd be having some serious problems."


	13. Chapter 13

It had been exactly one week since Abi had given her statement to the police and she was still yet to hear anything. She'd spent the week moping around the house, calling in sick to work everyday to avoid the awkwardness of going in and answering questions, when Jay decided to do something about it.  
"Come on, get dressed," he ordered one morning, hitting her lightly with a cushion.  
"What for?" she asked through a yawn.  
"I have got big plans for us today baby, that's what for."  
Abi looked skeptical. "What kind of plans?"  
"All will be revealed. Just get up of your bum, lazybones."  
Abi stood reluctantly but stuck her tongue out as she passed Jay to let him know that she wasn't mad.  
"Can't you give us a clue?" she shouted from the other end of the house. "So I at least have some idea of what to wear?"  
"Nothing adventurous, I promise. And pack an overnight bag too."  
Abi stuck her head round the door and Jay could see from her bare shoulders that she had no clothes on. He couldn't help but get a little bit excited.  
"An overnight bag?"  
"Stop asking questions will ya and get on with."  
"Alright, alright," Abi replied, disappearing behind the door again. "But just remember, I hate surprises."  
"You're going to like this one, I promise."

Jay had actually planned very little for their day out, deciding only last minute that he needed to get Abi out of the house, so he chose to do all of the usual touristy things around London. After borrowing some money from Billy, which he promised to pay back, the pair caught the tube into central London and wandered around going in the Science Museum and Madame Tussauds as well as taking a trip on the London Eye.  
"It makes you realise, doesn't it," Abi spoke as she stared out at the view from their pod on the London Eye. "How insignificant you are."  
"What?" Jay asked, coming up behind her.  
"I mean, there's so many people in the world. Millions, billions even."  
"Yeah?"  
"And there's people like you and me just going about our daily lives, just living, and the rest of the world doesn't even know about us."  
"But that isn't exactly a bad thing."  
"It isn't?" Abi turned around to face Jay.  
"We might be insignificant to the world but we're significant to individuals. You're significant to me."  
Abi raised an eyebrow. "What a cliché!"  
Jay laughed. "You're the one getting all deep and metaphysical."  
Abi laughed. "So I'm significant to you?"  
"Of course you are. You're my girlfriend."  
The smile from Abi's face quickly disappeared and she turned her back to Jay to face the view again.  
"Or not," he added quickly. "If you don't want to be. If it's too soon then-"  
"No, I do."  
"Then why the sudden change of mood?"  
"It's just, the last time I heard somebody say I was their girlfriend was at the airport when _he_ was trying to get me to go to Costa Rica with him."  
Jay nodded understandingly. "We can take things slow. I won't be offended if you don't want to be with me just yet...much."  
Abi smiled. "I want to be with you more than anything else."  
Inside Jay was exploding with happiness. He'd been waiting for Abi to say those words to him for weeks, months even, and even though he knew she loved him this topped it all of. He could walk around the square now with her on his arm and the knowledge that she was all his and nobody else's. Of course, he tried to play it cool on the outside though.  
"I'm glad to hear it, because you're stuck with me now," he joked, nudging her in the hip playfully.  
Taking him by surprise, Abi stood up on her tiptoes and kissed Jay. It only lasted a matter of seconds but it was enough to confirm the way she felt about him.  
"So what's the plan after this?" Abi asked as if the kiss hadn't just happened.  
"Dinner, my treat."

After they had eaten, the pair headed back to their London hotel. It had been a big meal which Abi had washed down with several glasses of wine. Jay thought about saying something, slowing her down, but he knew that if he'd been through the hell that she had he'd want a few glasses of wine too.  
"Oh, it's a double?" Abi noted as they walked in.  
Jay hadn't even thought that Abi might not want to share a bed with him. He could have kicked himself for being so thoughtless. "I see if we can change rooms if you want. Or I'll sleep on the floor."  
Abi shook her head. "No, it's fine."  
"Are you sure because-"  
"Jay, it's fine. Honestly."  
Jay nodded and brought their bags into the room while Abi wandered in and sat down on the bed.  
"I'm beginning to think those glasses of wine were maybe not such a great idea. My head is starting to hurt already. God knows what it'll be like in the morning."  
Jay sat down beside her so their thighs were touching. "It's okay to let loose once in a while, right?"  
Abi nodded in agreement. "Thank you."  
"For what?"  
"For everything. For today, for staying with me through the police and-"  
"Abs, you don't have to thank me."  
"I kind of do, you spent a shit tonne of money on me today."  
Jay laughed, shaking his head at the same time. "I wasn't talking about that. You don't have to thank me for sticking around. I'd do anything for you, you know that."  
"Yeah, I do."  
Abi leaned into Jay and kissed him more passionately than she had ever done before. At first, Jay was taken by surprise but he quickly responded and kissed Abi back just as hungrily. Slowly, he began to leave a trail of kisses down her jaw and neck and he smiled as he heard her familiar moan. Abi's hands wandered down to his trousers and she began to undo his belt before Jay put his hand on hers, stopping her.  
"What is it?" she asked, her voice barely above a whisper.  
"Are you sure about this?"  
"Of course I am. We've done it like a million times before."  
"I know. But we haven't done it since-"  
"Since John." Abi turned away and looked down at her hands. "I know I shouldn't have told you. You think differently of me now."  
"No, it's not that."  
"I don't blame you. I've been used. I'm disgusting."  
"Abi, listen to me," Jay put his hand on her chin, forcing her to look him in the eye. "You're beautiful. The only disgusting person around here is John."  
"You're just saying that."  
"I mean it. Trust me, I want to sleep with you more than anything but I need to know that you're ready first. I don't want to push you into anything, especially when you've been drinking."  
"It's not pushing if I want it."  
"And you're sure about that? Absolutely positive?"  
Abi nodded. "You're the only good thing to ever happen to me."  
Jay bit his lip. "Okay, but if we do this you have to promise me you'll tell me if you need to stop. I need to know you're alright."  
"I promise."  
Jay stared at Abi for a moment, taking in the plea of her facial expressions and the confidence of her body language before deciding that she was ready and leaning in for another kiss. A few minutes later, clothes were being taking over but it was nothing like the desperate sex they had had hundreds of times before. This was slow and gentle, with Jay checking Abi was okay at every stage.  
"Will you stop asking me that?" Abi giggled. "I'm fine. I'll tell you if I'm not."  
Jay nodded. "Are you ready?"  
"I'm ready."

The next morning Jay awoke with a smile. Abi's head was on his chest, both of them stripped of any clothing, as she slept peacefully. It was the first good night's sleep she'd had for the past week. He'd heard her wake up from a nightmare every night since John died and he rushed in to check on her but their had been no need for comforting the previous night.  
"Stop staring at me, Jay. It's weird."  
Jay jumped at the sound of Abi's voice. "I thought you were asleep."  
"It's hard to sleep with you staring into my soul." Abi's eyes fluttered open. "Morning."  
"Morning," Jay smiled. "Did you sleep alright?"  
"Perfect."  
"Good. Come on, let's get dressed and head down for some breakfast."  
"No," Abi said, taking his arm and pulling him back into bed. "Five more minutes."  
"Okay, five more minutes."  
"Last night, it was good right?"  
"It was amazing," Jay reassured her.  
"I mean, I didn't tense up or-"  
"Abs, you were great."  
Jay lent down and kissed Abi on the cheek just as her phone began to ring.  
"It's Lauren, I better answer it."  
"Go ahead."  
"Hello...? I'm at a hotel with Jay...In London...Why? What's happened?" Abi went silent for a few seconds and looked up at Jay with worried eyes. "Okay, I'll just get changed and we'll be straight over."  
"What's happened?" Jay asked as Abi hang up.  
"It's the police. They're looking for me."

The last hour had been a fury of rush and panic. While Jay tried to reassure Abi that everything was going to be alright, it was of no use and she became more and more convinced that the police had come to arrest her. All the way home on the tube, she sat agitated, her knee constantly jiggling and Jay had to almost run to keep up with her once they were at the station.  
"Abs, slow down, will ya?"  
"We haven't got time, Jay. I need to know what they want."  
The pair stopped outside the door to Billy's and Jay put his hands on Abi's shoulders.  
"Everything's going to be fine, I promise."  
"But what if I get sent to be prison."  
"You won't."  
"I might."  
"Abs, it might not even go to trial."  
"It might."  
"And if it does we'll make it work, okay? There is nothing to be afraid of, you've got me now."  
Abi nodded. "Okay, lets go."  
Abi let Jay go in the house first and followed close behind him, suddenly clinging on to his hand as soon as she saw the police.  
"Stella? What are you doing here?" Abi asked.  
"Abi, I came down as soon as I heard." Stella stood up and came towards Abi. "Why didn't you tell me what was going on?"  
Abi shrugged. "I thought I could handle it. What's going on?" she looked towards DCI Marsden.  
"We have some news for you, Abigail."  
Abi looked up at Jay and he rubbed his index finger in a circle against her hand, reassuring her that everything was going to be okay.  
"We've been through both yours and Mr Brown's statements and it's been decided that the case will not be taking to court."  
"What?"  
"There won't be a trial."  
Jay picked Abi up by the waist and spun her around. "Did you hear that, Abs? I told you everything was going to be fine, you're innocent."  
"You're serious?" Abi asked. "I'm not going to be sent to prison."  
"Due to the history between you and John Smith, we believe it won't do anybody any good bringing up the past again, particularly you Miss Branning, and we can see that he's death was nothing but self defence. Like Mr Brown said, you're innocent. I'll leave you two alone."  
"You have my number, Abi," Stella added as she also went to leave. "Just give me a call if you ever need anything."  
Abi nodded.  
"Looks like it's just you and me again, Abs. We should do something to celebrate."  
"You were right," Abi looked up at Jay. "I honestly thought-"  
"I know you did. But I promised you I was going to protect you, didn't I? Nothing bad is going to happen while you're with me, I mean it."  
"I love you, Jay Brown."

"I think we should go somewhere," Abi told Jay.  
It had been over two weeks now since Abi had been told that there would be no trial and she had a rare day off from work after being busy non-stop for the last two weeks due to her weeks absence before. The pair had decided to have a quiet day and watch a few films and eat far too much popcorn.  
"Like a holiday?" Jay asked.  
"No, like move completely. It's like Manchester all over again."  
"What do you mean?"  
"People talking, the constant reminder of what happened. I know you have your family here but...Don't worry, it was a stupid suggestion."  
"Where were you thinking?"  
"Huh?"  
"Of moving to, where would we go? Essex? Liverpool? Ireland?"  
"Actually, I was think a little bit further a field than that."  
"Yeah?"  
Abi nodded. "Do you remember when I was doing my GCSE's?"  
"It's hard to forget you were so stressed out all the time," Jay chuckled.  
"And that day we were talking, more like wishing, about moving some place exotic when we were older."  
"California," Jay remembered.  
"Yeah, California. What do you think?"  
Jay went silent for a moment before speaking up again. "I think it's the best idea you've had since we've been together."  
"Really?" Abi sounded surprised. "I thought you'd say no."  
"You're right. People round here don't forget about things easily, we could both do with a fresh start and it's not like I have much family left around here now. I don't even have a job to lose."  
"We could get some work over there. I was looking into it and they've got some animal parks over there. It would be just like the work I did when I was in Costa Rica, and if it fails we could always come back. This could be our new start, Jay."  
"California," Jay mused. "I like it."  
"You do?"  
"Yeah. Just you, me and the rest of our lives. Together."

 _ **So that's the end. Thank you for keeping with me everybody and for your lovely reviews! I know the last few chapters have been a bit bland and I did want to write more chapters but I wasn't sure which direction to take it in so I thought I'd call it a day. I am now planning an idea for a new fanfic which will hopefully be up within the next few days so keep an eye out for that. Again, don't forget to leave your reviews on this last chapter and let me know what you thoughh of the ending and the story overall :)**_


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